F-Zero races!

[Sarcasm will work for pants]

Yeah,so there's aracing tournament going on,the first F-Zero race tournament.Once we have 6 and/or when we reach next Wednesday,we'll start.As for how you join,see below.

Name(doesn't nessicarily have to be your username)
Car's name
What car looks like and/or post a sprite.
up to three Weapons(to latch onto car)
How much ammo each of your weapons has
Sponser(s)
What your car does best(Speed,acceleration,handling,or defense)
What car does worst(see above catagories)
What car does second best(See above catogories)
If you have any arch-rivals,and,if so,who
Any info about yourself
Any other stuff you would like to post(YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!!!)

And,no,I won't be doing a comic.It just helps if you post a sprite so I can describe it better in the summary.
Also,there won't be any favorites.I will choose the winner statisticly,depending on the course.So,if your good on defense,but not on handiling,you'll probably win on a course with a lot of obstacles and few turns,but wreck and not even get a Tin Medal on tracks with incredibly sharp turns.
And,once 6 have joined,feel free to join anyway(you just won't be in the first race or two or whatever)
And this can sometimes depend on pure luck.Such as the first course,Volcano Eruption,which has a little bit of everything.
So come join and,good luck!

[ March 19, 2003, 08:40 PM: Message edited by: Sarcasm says:TOUCH THE MONKEY ]

[Mista Massimiliano]

Name: Self
Car's name: The Fork
What car looks like and/or post a sprite: A Terran Vulture from Starcraft, except with yellow streaks.
up to three Weapons: Dual LPA Machineguns (on the sides)
How much ammo each of your weapons has: Starts off with 200, fires a bullet every .1 seconds, but recharges bullets (one every .5 of a second)
Sponser(s): Uber Soldat Industries
What your car does best(Speed,acceleration,handling,or defense): Handling
What car does worst: Defense
Second Worst: Acceleration
What car does second best: Speed
If you have any arch-rivals,and, if so, who: No, N/A.
Any info about yourself: Self is a stick person riding a Terran Vulture with a top. Anything else needed?
Any other stuff you would like to post: No.

[smacky]

Name:Chubbs
Cars Name ime (doesnt have to be a F-zero car name,does it?)
Car:A DeLorean Woo!
Weps:Missles,Laser,Machine Gun
Ammo:Infinite!
Sponsors:CrackerBarrel and Pine-Sol....
Goods:Speed
Bads efense
Sortas:handling
Rivals:um...the other racers..
Info:uh huh
Stuff:More Stuff

[Sarcasm will work for pants]

I forgot to mention onlyweak weapons can have unlimited ammo.So,your lasers and missiles can have infinite,but the missles can't.I'll change it to 5.(Missiles are powerful.Don't look at me.)

Also,you will never die,and even be in the standings if you get last place in the first few races.The points for the first race(where the first 6 will be racing)will go like this:

1st:100 points
2nd:75 points
3rd:50 points
4th:25 points
5th:10 points
6th:0 points

Chubbers,no it doesn't.Cell84,you can only have one character.Pick Chubbers or that other guy(Sorry about forgetting the name.)as your new rival,or don't have a rival.

[ March 19, 2003, 09:25 PM: Message edited by: Sarcasm says:TOUCH THE MONKEY ]

[cell84]

Name: ....look up

Car's name: Duel Simitar

What car looks like: um...eh..like Green Amazone from F-zero 2 except with a giant yellow C at the front

Weapons: Machine Gun, Ion Cannon(stops the opponents engine for 5 seconds), Minigun(you know? Those huge things that look like chainguns? Yeah...)

Ammo: Machine Gun=200 Ion Cannon=NONE! Uses car energy that recharges at the pit stops Minigun=250

Sponser: Simitar Engine Company

What your car does best: Handling

What car does worst: acceleration

What car does second best: Speed

Arch-rivals: no one

Any info about yourself: None so far

[ March 20, 2003, 04:19 PM: Message edited by: cell84 ]

[Introbulus]

Name: Introbulus AND Jim
Car's name: Super Station Wagon
What car looks like : A sation wagon (suprise, suprise!)
up to three Weapons: Giant laser (on top), hyper-drive engine (on back), flying module (wheels).
ammo: Laser (It's powerful, so only two shots per pit stop), hyper-drive engine (one turbo-charge per pit stop), flying module (infinite ability to fly!)
Sponsors: Inter-dementional-space-time-police (IDSTP), SSS, Clorox.
What your car does best: Speed(Speed,acceleration,handling,or defense)
What car does worst: handling
What car does second best: defense
Second worst: acceleration

Any info about yourself: Jim and Introbulus drive their car together. While Jim manages the weapons, Introbulus does all the actual driving. As inter-dementional-space-time-travelers, they need money to fund all their crazy schemes, which is one of the least important reasons they joined this race, since they have plenty of money anyway. They basically joined the race for fun, and therefore, their only rivals are anyone that gets in their way. Other than that, they are fairly nutral

Other stuff: The Super Station Wagon was made for IDSTT (Inter-dementional-Space-time-travel). Introbulus spent a few days modifying it so it could go faster for the races. Because it was made to combat the oddities of IDST, it's weapons system is very powerful.

By the way, are YOU going to be entering the tournament?

Editorial: By "fly", I mean, fly more than usual racers do. Rather than that "floating" stuff, it can actually fly if needed.

[ March 20, 2003, 04:11 PM: Message edited by: Introbulus ]

[LemonyDudeGuy912328]

Name: Matt

Car's name: Death Row

What car looks like: Monster truck with spikes in front.

Weapons: Spikes, bomb blaster, tar blow.

How much ammo each of your weapons has: Spikes are unlimited. Bomb blaster can shoot up to 15. Tar blow total is 15 gallons--each blow = 1 gallon.

Sponser(s): Dumbcomix, VGF

What your car does best: Handling

What car does worst: Defense

What car does second best: Speed

Arch-rivals: Yes. Everyone.

Any info about yourself: Good with racing.

Any other stuff you would like to post: My motto is "I beat you in racing, or I beat your backside."

[ March 29, 2003, 02:09 PM: Message edited by: The Lemon With One Brain ]

[Sarcasm will work for pants]

No,Introbolus(and Jim)I won't be joining.By the way...WE ONLY NEED ONE MORE RACER!Whoo hoo!

Oh,and a layout of the first course:

1 lap
No pit stops(Hey,it's only one lap!)
First Strech:Straightaway,two firey spinners side by side,one slightly in front of the other.Need:Good handiling and defense.
Right after:Sharp turn,followed idmediatly by a booster that boosts you across a giant chasm.Need good handiling.
Calm before the storm:What do you think?
CRRRRACK!:The floor beneath you starts to crumble.Need good speed.
Final Strech:No dangers here,other than weapons.Just don't hit the volcano,or this course will be titled aptly.Need good defense,even if no one hits the volcano.
Also,Best fruit ever/Matt,I'm not the type to use profanity.So I'm changing it "backside",okay?

[ March 20, 2003, 07:12 PM: Message edited by: Sarcasm says:TOUCH THE MONKEY ]

[LemonyDudeGuy912328]

Originally posted by Sarcasm says:TOUCH THE MONKEY:
Also,Best fruit ever/Matt,I'm not the type to use profanity.So I'm changing it "backside",okay?

That's fine.

[Sarcasm will work for pants]

B-UMp(Just because)

[DVGBC]

My version of the NC Grand Prix failed miserably (not enough people entered in the first place). So I can give this a try.

Name: DVGBA
Car's name: Audi R8
(OK, so it's not a sprite... but it's better than nothing.)
up to three Weapons(to latch onto car): Plasma Rifle (near the rear of the car), Light Missiles (front of car), and Grenade Launcher (above the driver)
How much ammo each of your weapons has: The Plasma Rifle fires slightly faster than a regular rifle, it's ammo is 200, but slowly regenerates; the Light Missiles fires quickly but are weak and it has 5 ammo (no regenerations); the Grenade Launcher fires slow and has 10 ammo (no regeneration)
Sponser(s): Infineon
What your car does best: Acceleration
What car does worst: Defense
What car does second best: Top Speed
If you have any arch-rivals, and, if so, who: No one really.
Any info about yourself: DVGBA is one of those people who just love racing video games. When he first heard about the NC Grand Prix 3, he enterd the race using the Ferrari Formula 1 car (the rules didn't mention anything about car limits). Although the race did not finish because of the server crash, he has learned valuable info which allowed him to eventally create the Neglected Character Grand Prix series. Unfortunately, the plan failed because of lack of entrants. He recently formed a soccer league in which all the forums of VGF are soccer teams. He also enters races if they are available.
Any other stuff you would like to post(YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!!!): Just wanted to say that the Audi R8 has a tremendous racing history. That's all I can say.

(I'm still unsure of ammo amounts, so I'm constantly changing.)

-------------------------------------------------

The ultimate soccer league for the forums of VGF has finally arrived. The first fixture is posted here so hurry and vote for the forum you think will win in each match.

[ March 26, 2003, 01:21 AM: Message edited by: VGF United FC ]

[Sarcasm will work for pants]

^You lucky dog!You got in just in time.
Summary of first race:
Matt drove up to the starting line...and started taunting.
"Oooh,nice car!Can you tell me which dumpster you brought it from?Ha ha ha!"
DVGBA:Hmph.Very funny.This happens to be a Formula-1 racing car.
Matt on't you mean Formula Zero?Ha ha ha!
Chubbers:Oh,and I suppose your car is truly the Ultima? Get real.You're no better than anyone here.
Matt;Oh,yes I am.Like my motto says,"I beat you in racing,or I beat your backside!"
(By now everyone is fed up with Matt,and the stack is soon to get higher...)
Cell84:*drives up*
Matt:Ooh,that's a nice car.Where'd you steal it from?Ha ha ha!
Cell84: For your information,I bought this car!!!
(Matt is about to throw more insults at the other racers,but all of a sudden a loud "GO!" is heard.)
Announcer:And,the race is on!The Super Station wagon uses their Turbo Boost for a good start,since their accleration is lo-ow!The other racers follow!Dime and Death Row are tied for second,cruising right alongside eachother.And here are the spinners!The Super Station Wagon uses their fly ability to get over,while Death Row is trying to squeeze in the narrow space.Dime is riding along beside him.
(Chubbers sees that the first spinner is coming up.He's in the perfect position...)
Announcer :P OW!Dime knocks Death Row into the first spinner and takes advantage of the narrow opening!
(Matt's car may have good defense,but a firey spinner knocking you into molten lava is never good for any car.All the other cars make it past.
Introbulus and Jim are now back on the ground.)
Introbulus(looking back):Hey,the little twerp got what he deserved!
Jim:Um...Introbolus?
Introbulus:*turns around to see they are approaching the tight turn*
Introbulus and Jim:AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
(Miracously,they make the turn,but hit the booster at an odd angle.This causes them to spin out...in midair...at an incredible speed.Introbulus is knocked out,while Jim,knowing its too late to try flying,utters these words
Jim:Can I get off this ride,now?Please?
Sound FX:CRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAASH!!!
Announcer:Well it looks like The Super Station Wagon couldn't handle that last turn.Anyways,back to the race.Chubbers fires a missle,which Cell84 and the Duel Simtar barely dodge.I don't think Cell84 sees the next one coming though...wait,hold on!A bump causes chubbers to miss!
Chubbers:Aw,shoot!
Announcer:And another bump severly slows down the Duel Simtar!
Chubbers:ALRIGHT!
Announcers:And the floor has started cracking!Although The Duel simtar has good speed,his accelration isn't good enough to get Cell84 up to it!Cell84 and the Duel Simitar go down in flames!No,seriously,they go down into the flames.
(All the remaining racers survive until Chubbers misfires his next missle and hits the volcano.)
Everything:*starts shaking*
Self and DVGBA:*look at Chubbers angrily*
Chubbers:Heh heh...
Announcers:Chubbers is hit by the lava first!His poor defense isn't good enough to handle that!Audi R8 and The Fork are neck in neck...it's gonna be a photo finish!
Camera:*takes the picture*
Announcer:Hold on,folks!We're waiting for the picture to develop...
Somebody:*hands the picture to the announcer*
Announcer:Well!The winner is...aw,just read the standing and find out for yourself.

6th place:Matt and Death row
5th place:Introbulus,Jim,and the Super Station Wagon
4th place:Cell84 and the Duel Simitar
3rd place:Chubbers and Dime
2nd place:.....Self and The Fork

Announcer:Which means DVGBA and Audi R8 are the winners!
DVGBA's fans:YEEEEEEEEEEA!
Announcer:Come back saturday,for the next race,where we'll have the cars fixed and they'll be going head to head in the Mushroom Kingdom,the biggest course we've got!

[DVGBC]

I never really expected my car to win. Of course, the Audi R8 is actually a LMP900 (Le Mans Prototype 900) class sports car in the ALMS, not a Formula 1 car. Just letting you know.

[Sarcasm will work for pants]

^I'd already planned everything out.I flipped a coin,not being able to decide whether you or Self should win.

[Sarcasm will work for pants]

I'm going to do this next one tomorrow.I promise.Also,although you need good handiling on this course,it's so insane it really requires nothing more than luck.1 lap,1 pit stop minimum.

[Mariosrpg loves Friends]

Name: Greek Kid

Car Name: The Olympus

Car Description: Its a blue race car with a white stripe down the middle and lighting bolts on the doors

Weapons: Lighting Bolts, electrifies and slows people down for a limited time. Olive Oil, that causes the cars to slip. And finally, the Giant Flip Flop. It comes out of the car and slams the other cars causing them to stop for a short time.

Ammo: Lightning Bolts, 100. Olive Oil, a lot of gallons. And the flip flop never runs out

Sponsors: The Greek Gods and Nintendo

Cars Best Ability: Defense

Cars Worst Ability: Handiling

Cars Second Best: Speed

Arch Rivals: Dimitrios.....

Info: Im gonna win this race because Im cool! Ive got the ladies on my side

Personal Quote: OPA!!!! (When I win)

[LemonyDudeGuy912328]

**** THIS.

[Sarcasm will work for pants]

Greek kid,I'll try to get you in NEXT race,okay?Also,offensive weapons are forbidden(don't worry,this won't happen often.)
Announcer:Ready...set...GO!And,once again,,the Super Station Wagon takes the lead!We'll be starting out at Bowser's Keep,by the way.And here comes the Thwomp!Onto Audi R8...almost.
DVGBA :P hew!That was a close one.*looks ahead to see he's going to crash into a pillar*GAH!*turns the steering wheel so hard it breaks and the car does a complete 360*Oops.*sees that the pillar is getting closer,blindfolds himself and starts to smoke a cigarette*
Sound FX:CRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!
Announcer :P oor DVGBA.Poorer Super Station Wagon.
And the racers are approaching the giant pit(no booster)that leads out the giant Bowser statue's mouth!
The Super Station Wagon's engine:*starts to smoke and sputter*
Super Station Wagon:*falls behind*
Announcer:But the Super Station Wagon makes it to the pit!And starts falling.
Jim:Why now?Why does our car have to fail on us NOW of all times?!
Introbulus:Is the flight engine working?
Jim:Hey!It is!Great thinking!
(They start to fly.When they're almost there...)
The flight engine:*starts to give out*
Introbulus:Oh,perfect.
(The flight engine completly gives out)
Jim:Why do we even bother?
(They start to fall)
Introbulus and Jim:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
Announcer:You can't pay for comedy like that.Anyways,The Fork also doesn't make the jump,but falls just after The Super Station Wagon.
And they're in the Mushroom Town,a maze of buildings.
(20 minutes later)
Death Row:*makes it out*
(7 minutes later)
Duel Simitar:*makes it out*
(1 " ")
Dime:*makes it out*
Announcer:Now they're all on Bandit's Way,where they MUST all pit stop.
Matt:*has been waiting for 7 minutes*Grrr...WHERE IS THAT PIT CREW?!
Dime and the Duel Simitar:*make it out of the pits*
Matt's pit crew:*finally shows up*
Matt:Where were you?!
Al Gore:We were at the shoe store ordering a cheeseburger.
BigMouth:Andtheyputpicklesonminedon'tyouthinkthat'sirritatingbecauseIdobecauseIdon'tlikepickles'causetheiricky.
Matt:Just Pit Crew my car!
(7 seconds later)
Matt:Hey!You're finally done!*drives off*
(0.2 seconds later)
Goofy:Whoops.Forgot to put more gas in.
(27 minutes later)
Announcer:And they're at the choice.They can either go on the elevators and get a pit stop,or take the faster route.
(Everyone other then Matt takes the elevators)
Matt:Heh.Those idiots.*still fails to notice the gas guage is 2 minutes away from empty*
(1 minute,49 seconds later)
Matt:*sees it's almost empty*I"M GONNA KILL THAT PIT CREW!!!!
Announcer:The racers approach the branch.One path goes left,one path goes right.Both lead to the finish.Due to a speed decrease,Death Row has fallen back.
Chubbers and Cell84:*look at eachother,nod their head*
Announcer:And...what's this?Dime and Duel Simitar have hooked onto Death Row,Dime on left,Duel Simitar on right.The're all going the same speed and...oh,I see.They go left and right while Death Row crashes.And it's close,but we don't need a photo finish.Chubbers has won.Tune in Tuesday for a race in Kongo Jungle!

[DVGBC]

I'm surprised that I've been taken out of the race first. On a side note, I'm a non-smoker. Just letting you know.

[Introbulus]

Wow, two crashes in a row! I hope I don't have THIS kind of luck for each race!