WAY confused and self-hating (might be offensive to some)

Discussion should include supportive responses.

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Fishmael
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#21

Post by Fishmael » Thu May 06, 2004 10:29 pm

Try asking your father for advice and be honest to your friend...Is what I would say, but I'm a few posts late.
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#22

Post by Mariosrpg loves Friends » Fri May 07, 2004 12:10 am

bam

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#23

Post by Vinny » Fri May 07, 2004 12:31 pm

Well, I could give you a lot of cliches about how you should be yourself (in my opinion you can never TRULY be yourself; you're always what you want other people to see in you, or at least what you have wanted other people to see in you in the past that transformed into what you are now) and not be scared and how much friends mean, but instead I'm gonna say what I think is true:

The only person who will get you through this is yourself. Yes, telling other people might help, but eventually what happens in your mind is up to you. Really, I don't think there's that much you can do but keep living with yourself. Don't commit suicide; that's just the easy way out and it will permanently damage relatives and close friends. Just think of how those close to you would react if you died. Can you even begin to imagine that? Do you really want them to feel that pain? If you won't do it for yourself, then do it for them.

I've been at points in my life when I utterly hated everything about myself. I think everyone has, except for the privileged few who get their asses kissed by everyone else merely because of the amount of money in their bank account (and wouldn't ya know it, those ones just so happen to be the biggest pricks on the planet. I wonder why?). And frankly, though you're not gonna agree with me right now, I think it's ultimately a GOOD thing, and that suffering will always, in the long run, lead to positive results. Believe me, nothing else will teach you as much about life as this experience. But what I want to say is that you should just hang in there. There's not much you can do right now, but all you need to do is just live, and, though it will take a long time, things WILL get better if you just hang in. Trust me. You can't just bear self-hate for years upon years, because it's simply impossible. Eventually you will, even if you can't explain how or why, learn from it, and you will become a better person for having suffered. Why do think royal figureheads were/are so arrogant? It's because they've never had something deal a huge blow to their self-esteem. What you're going through is very necessary for growing up, and you'll be thankful you went through it in the end.

Look, I've never been the comforting one, but all I can say is that we all go through this phase, admittedly for varying reasons. But the only one who will make things better, and it won't even be through a voluntary act, it'll just happen as events that will affect your opinion of yourself unfold, is yourself. Give it a year, maybe two, and I guarantee you that things will be better. All you can do for now is wait for the skies to clear and the sun to break through again. Because sometime throughout the whole ordeal, when the emotional tornado has passed and torn every building inside you to the ground, leaving only unrecognizable rubble, the citizens of your subconscious mind will come out, study the previous blueprints, notice all the mistakes in the architecture, and will build completely new buildings, this time ten times stronger and practically indestructible, and will re-settle into their routine. And when the tornado comes again, they'll be damn well ready for it.

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#24

Post by The Missing Link » Mon May 10, 2004 12:20 am

That's a good start.

But yes, you do need to tell her soon. But I'd also advise that you advise her to get some help, because I don't think you'll be able to give her the help she'll need.

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#25

Post by PolandFightsDutch » Mon May 10, 2004 1:36 am

I suggest giving it to her straight; then improvise on the spot to her bad reaction. If it is bad, I'd suggest running away and going into hiding. It's what I wouldn't do, but eh. [img]graemlins/lol.gif[/img]

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#26

Post by The Missing Link » Mon May 10, 2004 2:31 am

In person is preferable, because that way if something happens, you can be there for them. If you're on the phone, if she gets all angsty and hangs up, you're SOL.

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#27

Post by PolandFightsDutch » Mon May 10, 2004 4:51 pm

A fish is a fish is a fish!

[ May 11, 2004, 12:26 AM: Message edited by: SilverWind ]

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#28

Post by The Missing Link » Fri May 14, 2004 11:08 pm

That's wonderful news. :D

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