Help? >>;

[The Missing Link]

Usually in conversation, you look people in the eyes when listening and then look all over the place when talking. I would say practice a "speech", but I find whenever I do that, I end up heavily editing it on-the-fly and then that throws me off, and I'm making the rest up anyways, sooo... you just have to tell yourself that the world won't end no matter what. And just go with the flow.


"There are some who call me... Link?"
"Carpe Gaium Domesticum!" (Seize the Cucco!)
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[Bomby]

Bah, don't prepare a speech, just be cool, talk to her about something that's going on around you that's worth talking about, get her to like you. Be funny. Make sure you smell good. Yeah, just be of-the-moment, try not to make it obvious that you're infatuated with her.

[Vinny]

Just talk to her as if she was one of your friends.

You know what? I hate to say it, but I'm sick of people who go around moaning, "OMG I CAN'T GET A GIRLFRIEND I CAN'T EVEN TALK TO HER OR MAKE ANY SORT OF GESTURE THAT ENTAILS HUMAN SOCIALIZATION WITHOUT CRAPPING MY PANTS." Here, I'll give you the best advice you ever had. Take notes, cause this is good stuff: Unzip your pants, look down, and find your balls. Now use them.

And yes, I realize that this comment makes me sound like the biggest ******* you'll ever meet. I also realized that I used to be exactly like that (although I never got nervous when talking to girls, for some reason). However, through two years of wallowing in my own misery for many different reasons (i.e. lack of friends because everyone in my grade is a ****ing moron (thank God that now I'm in high school where I can meet people from other grades; I'd also like to add that sophomores kick ass. If you're a sophomore, give yourself a pat on the back. Don't ask me why, just do it, and know that you have my respect), and obsession with a girl), I've finally managed to realize one thing: NO ONE can do anything to help you out of your situation, nor does anyone really give that much of a damn to do anything about it anyway. You've just gotta be strong and pull through it yourself and things'll get better.

I can understand how you feel, since I was weighed down with the same feeling of helplessness for two long years, but because of what I suffered I've managed to realize that whining never accomplishes anything except making you feel helpless, bringing you down and making you feel like there's nothing you can do about anything, which is never the case. You think that others can say some magical word that will just make your life entirely better overnight, but guess what? They're just as human as you are, and if you can't think of magical insta-fix solutions, then they sure as hell can't.

Also (this does not include you), to people who say "OMG I DUNNO ANYTHING BOUT LIFE HOW DO U GET A GIRL TO LIEK YUO," here's my response: I DON'T KNOW! And nobody else knows. There isn't some incredibly witty one-liner that you can just drop by that will make a girl wet herself for you, so stop asking people for it. All you can do is talk to her. THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN DO ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR OWN LIFE IS YOU. I'm way the hell over the sea in London; I sure as hell can't help you.

Now, you probably think I'm the biggest self-obsessed turd you ever saw, because, admittedly, that was kind of aggressive. Just know that I didn't really mean that in an insulting manner, more like constructive criticism . Hell, Sab, if there's anyone here who doesn't have anything against you, it's me. My main point is that you should really stop asking people for advice on things that you could easily fix yourself. Like I said, just get some balls. Tell that whiny little "I can't do it" voice inside you to go **** itself and leave you alone. Trust me, it works .

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Quote of the week:
"Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read." - Frank Zappa
Image of the week:

Pointless fact of the week:
When the University of Nebraska Cornhuskers play football at home, the stadium becomes the state's third largest city.

[Bomby]

Don't think about what you're gonna do, that'll just make you dwell on it, the more you dwell on it, the more nervous you'll get. If you try to prepare something, you'll forget it when you go up to talk to her then you'll be mad at yourself and embarass yourself and run away.

Be spontaneous.

[The Missing Link]

*gets out the pom poms and megaphones* Go team!

[Vinny]

Yeah, I know. The thing I was telling him was to stop trying to rely on others so much when he can do it himself. I too wish there was a magic one-liner you could say, but alas... That part was actually in response to a friend of mine who asked me "what can you say around a guy that will make him like you (she's a girl)?" That's one of the most ridiculous questions I've ever been asked.

Oh, yeah. And spontaneity is good. It makes conversation natural and you won't be trying to remember what to say, which can sometimes easily come accross. Do you prepare speeches when you're talking normally to friends? Why should it be any different with her? And if you do prepare speeches for your friends, I suggest you get a shrink. The only time you should ever prepare speeches is when you're going to ask her out (or when you're about to tell her that you just lost her wallet with $100 in it). Of course, already having a subject about which you're going to talk before you approach her is completely acceptable. You just can't be thinking inwardly "Dammit... what was I gonna say again?" That'll just make things worse.

-----------------------------------------------------------------
Quote of the week:
"Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read." - Frank Zappa
Image of the week:

Pointless fact of the week:
When the University of Nebraska Cornhuskers play football at home, the stadium becomes the state's third largest city.

[ March 23, 2004, 01:59 PM: Message edited by: Cuban Pete ]