OLD MAN YELLS AT CLOUD: where we complain about popular things in media we don't like to feel better about ourselves

[I REALLY HATE POKEMON!]

I find it amusing how Trump haters always find a way to work him into everything completely unrelated, that man lives in more people's heads rent free than the bogeyman does for kids.

Anyway, for once a character being arbitrarily race swapped is the least of a show's issues (from what I read about it anyway). Apparently it's a masterwork in awful writing, and it doesn't even look particularly well animated, it just has seemingly no redeeming value. Yeah, sure, it's woke, but even if you eliminated those elements it wouldn't make it a good show, y'know? It's the worst rated animated show in IMDB history, what would those improvements really do, bump it up to the 2nd or 3rd worst animated show? It's obviously a lost cause all around.

What's funny though is Capt was right on the money about the hate-watching thing. Pretty great call there.

[Gametrek]

Speaking of Hate watch. You know Howard Stern [removed] has all those chit-chats with Robin???
That is the same reason why people listen to him. I mean seriously that is what this crap is about. Attention. She is [removed]

Lets be realistic.
1. This show "Velma" is [removed]

What are "stereotypes". What theater puts in front of you when the audience is so confused of what this character is suppose to be like. Take Gargamel ( We are going to the Smurfs ).... he dress in black, has a long nose, with funny teeth, and balding head, and owns a cat ( Like John Arbuckle ). He just wants to eat some Smurf-Pie as with John Arbuckle wants to eat Poon-tang. Then the Smurfs themselves all where the funny hats, all are blue, and pappa Smurf for some reason has a beard. [removed]

[removed] When people wanted to make animated cartoons with regular people. [removed]

[removed]

Now the script is the only real problem here. In fact they play this animation off as a retool or revamp like a play. That being said Hollywood is garbage and [removed].

Think of it like this. [removed]

...............

Hollywood is a distraction and has been pulling crap out of it's arse forever. Nonsense like

[removed]

That is what this "Velma" really about.

[removed] I just wanted to see a traditional Scooby-Doo, with antics, sounds, and plot-twists. Not "My father and mother quarreling over nonsense" [removed]

It is just pure sad-evil-stuff being written inside of "Velma" and does not bring out the best in me at all. It is like my clients/bosses telling me to eat poo, that is what you are, or something like that.

[removed]

[CaptHayfever]

Are you being deliberately obtuse?

Pretty sure the above reply means the answer to this question is yes.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[Booyakasha]

...I'm so sick of seeing this vile fermenting garbage on the forums. It's reprehensible.

Do we not ban people anymore? Why do we not omit this revolting bigoted clownshoes from our sight?

[Gametrek]

A thread called "OLD MAN YELLS AT CLOUD" might as well call it "OLD WIVES TALES PART DX".

Could you be more specific in detail Booyakasha? Not going into Velma unless Mindy Kaling hits the fan.

[removed]

[CaptHayfever]

So anyway, pity about Warrior Nun getting cancelled; it looked interesting.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[I REALLY HATE POKEMON!]

Never heard of it but it reminds me of Nun Attack, which was alright for a bit.

[Booyakasha]

Gods below.......how does Mick Jagger do it?

He's not overly handsome. And I just rewatched 'Miss You', so you can knock off that 'Moves Like Jagger' crap right now. He dances like a thouand centipedes and an upside-down skeleton thrown into a human suit, and I can't take my eyes off him. He's so goldang weird! Stop it! Or do it always!

[Booyakasha]

...so I watched another crummy YouTube garbagey video that's hurt my entertainment from things. You know...put these things in books where they won't affect my appreciation of the movie 'Conan the Barbarian'! There is literally nothing wrong with 'Conan the Barbarian'-----------it is pure fantasy!

The video has all these asshats all annoyed that they insert loon-sounds in movies in order to evoke things. Loneliness, sorrow. Distance from civilisation. Great. I've heard those sounds all my life just because I live in Wisconsin where loons live-----------loons wailing and yodeling. Only now I know that other people don't hear loons in their everyday lives, and they have an attitude about it, and so now I'm never not going to notice it. This is going to be the next Wilhelm------------the next dumb little thing that's going to make me hate movies, or at the very least detract from them.

They specifically pointed out a scene in 'Rome' (a show I love, a show I should be allowed to love) where Vorenus and Pullo were sat at a campfire and a loon-call goes off. Next time I watch 'Rome', even if I don't remember this from the start, I will notice that loon sound. And I'll be pissed off that once again jerks had to try to ruin something.

Why does anyone care that the HBO guys put loon sounds in Egypt? It's a sound that instantly evokes a feeling of remoteness and sadness and being surrounded by wilderness, and here Vorenus and Pullo are a million miles from nowhere at the end of their rope, and people are annoyed by it.

Yeah, there wouldn't be loon-sounds in Egypt. You know what else there wouldn't be in Egypt? Ancient Roman soldiers speaking modern English in UK accents with background music.

It's a show. Stop it.

I'm so flipping irritated. I put on 'Conan the Barbarian' to cheer myself up because it's been a rotten week, and just now there was a loon call, and now I want to lie down on the floor until I die of old age.

[Booyakasha]

So I rewatched 'Tombstone', and there's a moment where Wyatt engages in...I don't know, call it ship-to-ship combat on horseback with one of the bad guys, and Wyatt's ingenious tactic is to hang off the far side of his horse in order to conceal himself. And I find myself wondering, '...why not shoot the horse? That would resolve this. Why not shoot the horse in the head with a shotgun? Is it considered untoward? Is it too ungentlemanly for even you, a demonstrably evil guy, to shoot a horse in its dumb stupid horse face?'

I mean, I'm pleased that Wyatt wins, but like why the heck don't the bad guys just go ahead and be evil? Is shooting horses too mean and evil even for the villain gang that happily murdered and plundered the wedding at the start of the flick?

[I REALLY HATE POKEMON!]

I just want to say "Why not shoot the horse in the head with a shotgun?" made me laugh out loud lol

[Booyakasha]

horse lives don't matter

2019

[I REALLY HATE POKEMON!]

Defund the PETA

[Booyakasha]

...isn't it funny, how movies will just bust you up inside for who knows why.

I'm watching 'Wizard of Oz' for the kabillionth time, and I'm at the part where Toto pulls back the curtain, and Dorothy tells the Wizard, "You're a very bad man!", and Oz answers, "Oh, no, my dear, I'm a very good man! I'm just a very bad wizard." And suddenly I can't stop crying.

[EDIT: You know, sometimes you understand a villain. Even like them, sometimes better than the hero. But there's just no liking Almira Gulch. She's right up there with Potter. Mean old slack-twisted ratbag.

[EDIT2: All my life I've been scared silly of tornadoes, and it's like 99% because of 'Wizard of Oz'. I mean, I love the movie, but jeepers lorenzo--------thanks for murdering regal sleep, here.

[EDIT3: ...gods below, but the Witch of the West is so mean and horrible. You know? That moment when the Witch has Dorothy locked up in her donjon-keep, and Dorothy sees the vision of Auntie Em, and she's so flippin scared, and the Witch shows up just to mock Dorothy and make her feel small...what an a-hole. Good grief.

[Booyakasha]

I am so tired of pointlessly long, long, stupidly long movies.

The new Indiana Jones movie is going to be over two and a half hours. And it's going to be disappointing. You know, the longer these stupid garbagey movies get, the less likely I am to watch any of them more than oncet. More than zero times, for that matter.

''Patton' is allowed to be three hours long, because it's art. Likewise 'Seven Samurai', and 'The Good, the Bad and the Ugly'. Kenneth Branagh's 'Hamlet' is four hours long, and that's perfectly acceptible. It's only 'Hamlet'. Meanwhile no stupid James Bond movie needs to be one hundred and sixty minutes. Are you flipping kidding me. Were you aware that I have the semblance of a life outside of your dumb idiot crapshow?

Back when I was a kid, I could watch all of the Tolkien flicks in the space of five hours. Nowadays it's like two entire days. Who the heck needs ten hours of 'The Hobbit'? It used to be under eighty minutes. (Also Peter Jackson's version of 'Far O'er the Misty Mountains' stinks compared to the cartoon one.)

[CaptHayfever]

"Jackson's Hobbit films are too long" is hardly a hot take. Now, if you tried to claim his LotR films were too long, we might have words.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[Booyakasha]

The vanilla movies aren't too long. The Extended Editions, now...those are exhausting. I don't know how anyone can dredge up the flippin patience for those things.

[Deku Tree]

I liked the long LotR movies, but I was really into them and kinda wanted as much of them as I could get. I was even into the first Hobbit movie, because I didn't mind meandering a bit through the world Tolkien created. The second one was worse and the third was awful, though.

I don't like that so many movies are 2.5-3 hours now either. I have to break it up into two sittings at home, and my wife will rarely agree to go to the theater for them. Plus I always get a big soda and it hurts to hold it to the end of these longer movies.

[Booyakasha]

I'm getting old! I have to go to the potty more often than I used to! It's one thing when you're watching a movie in your living room (you can put it on pause), but even there, why in the blistering hell do any of these crappy movies need to be so long?

...this is why I've seen 'Jungle Book' and 'Hudson Hawk' and 'Ace Ventura 2' about a hundred times more often than the LotRs. I don't hate those movies at all, but they aren't exactly art, and these dumb long movies drive me bonkers. Like...I need to mow the lawn. Shut the hell up, Frodo, I need to mow the lawn.

I don't want to hear Gandalf bloviating endlessly on about destiny-----------I want to hear Patton screaming, "When you put your hand! Into a bunch of goo! That a moment before was your best friend's face?!? You'll know what to do." That movie is rad. LotR can bite me.

I'm not the bad guy, here!

[EDIT: You know, I couldn't claim I know how historically accurate Patton's movie speech is, but it sure is fun to quote. "We're not just going to shoot the bastards---------we're going to cut out their living guts and use them to grease the treads of our tanks!" Friggin psycho, man. I love it.

[Deku Tree]

I only know that quote from the Simpsons.