MCU Megathread

[CaptHayfever]

Some news:
--Jon Watts has stepped down as Fantastic Four director, citing exhaustion. He just spent most of the last decade making Spider-Man movies & dealing with the Sony/Disney arguments, so that makes sense.
--The release dates for Ant-Man & the Wasp: Quantumania and The Marvels have been swapped, since the former has already finished principal photography & the latter has not.
--Three new Legends episodes dropped today: Doctor Strange, Wong, & a 2nd Scarlet Witch one (that's mostly the same as the 1st one).
--The Moon Knight finale drops this coming Wednesday.
--Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness opens on Friday.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

Upcoming dates:
Ms. Marvel premieres in just over 3 weeks (June 8th).
Thor: Love & Thunder opens in just *under* 8 weeks (July 8th).
She-Hulk has just been revealed to premiere in almost exactly 3 months (August 17th).
Now on to part 66 (yes, there's another skipped number that we'll double back around to)....


Moon Knight:

#1 "The Goldfish Problem":
--I've done singing cups before. People act like you have to have crystal cups, but regular glass works--HOLY PHANTOM PAIN, BATMAN!?!D:;lkjfa;d
--So he sleepwalks?
--Does this kid think he's dead?
--Background poster says the Egypt exhibit runs April-June.
--Wow, I've had managers that obnoxious back in the Kmart days.
--This voice sounds like Tom Hardy Venom.
--Luckily for our hero, these guys are horrible shots.
--This whole town is pulling an "O Captain, My Captain" on this guy.
--Oh, a *very* Egyptian cult run by an American in Austria!
--Brings new meaning to "playing chicken".
--Oof, I could tell when he woke up he'd already missed the date.
--Let's ignore the battery for a second. How has he never heard this phone ring before?
--Just get some sleep, Steven; this is all a bad dream. Just go back to snoring, "Khon-shoooo, khon-shoooo...."
--Ok, now I see where this is going, Egyptian deity vs Egyptian deity. A bit Cloak & Dagger, a bit Yu-Gi-Oh.
--Appreciate the Cameron jab.
--I could not hear Steven mutter to himself, so I thought "What are you doing, Steven?" was a missing VO line from Marc when the subtitle came up.
--The mirror stuff is cool, but I just watched Last Night in Soho, which has even cooler mirror stuff.
--They really should credit the character creators in the "Based on" credit.

#2 "Summon the Suit":
--Marc, you couldn't erase the footage of yourself once you noticed the camera?
--Steven's relationship with Living Statue.
--The storage clerk recognizing our protagonist gave me serious Fight Club vibes.
--Was that freeze-frame supposed to happen? It looked like a streaming glitch.
--Based on the episode title & Layla's dialogue here, I'm really scared this is gonna be another "the powers come from the suit" situation rather than "the suit comes from the powers".
--These cops are hella sketchy--oh, & I'm already right.
--Why wouldn't you lock your door at night? Just because the neighbors are trustworthy doesn't mean other people can't show up.
--As Captain America so eloquently put it: "I thought the punishment usually came *after* the crime. [...] Every time someone tries to win a war before it starts, innocent people die." Ammit's version of "justice" is just Project Insight all over again.
--Wait, "Ammit's tomb?" She's dead? Well, screw her, then!
--Very creative fight scene; I love it.
--Arthur, you didn't even judge that guy; you just murdered him.
--Well, the upside of no more job is no more having to worry how long you're out of town.

#3 "The Friendly Type":
--It seems unwise to put your fake passport in your real name.
--Very fun fight. I like how he approaches each of these guys differently.
--An unknown 3rd persona? Pretty sure we already did that with Typhoid Mary.
--So, since the Blip, we've had a huge stone dude appear in the ocean, a Celestial appear in space above Earth, a big dimensional rip above New York, & now a freak eclipse visible all over the world at once. Folks are gonna be really dang freaked out.
--IRL, the Great Pyramid is the tomb of the pharoah Khufu & his queen; there isn't a big meeting room inside.
--What's this "Osiris" you speak of? I believe you mean "Slifer". His avatar even *dresses* like an executive producer.
--Ok, the Egyptian gods are ridiculously easy to dupe.
--The first rule of Joust Club is: You do not talk about Joust Club.
--Dude, you had to know *touching the stuff* wasn't gonna fly with Anton.
--Anton, you dummy, you just let him destroy your stuff.
--Oof, that zoom to the top of the pyramid looked pretty bad.
--Ok, this has just become a Deadpool fight.
--No, not the mask nano-teching itself off & on for no reason thing!
--The front side of this origami doesn't look like any northern hemisphere constellation. The pin-prick shine-though, however, is Orion, but how would Steven have known that was there?
--Why the hell is one of the other avatars bringing Harrow back in here & leaving him alone? The gods must be crazy.

#4 "The Tomb":
--How many other gods has Slifer imprisoned!?
--When did she close the truck door?
--Why the closeup on the ancient Egyptian dental tool?
--"Being honesty" is adorable.
--Marc just Will-Smithed Steven.
--Guardian cat statues give me the heebie-jeebies for some reason.
--What has 6 points & relates to ancient Egypt?
--Something something Hoary Hosts of Horus.
--Where the hell are we? This would work so much better if we could follow their motion through the pyramid better.
--This is quite a plot hole.
--Such a gross dude (the mummification guy).
--Such a gross dude (Arthur Harrow).
--Steven could really use that dental tool from back in camp.
--Who just believes the bad guy when he says stuff like that?
--The timeline of Marc & Layla's relationship is very muddled. How long were they married?
--Wow, not even pretending to judge him this time.
--Wasn't this supposed to be 6 episodes? And isn't this the 2nd clearly-an-ending shot of this episode? And aren't there 16 minutes left on the progress bar?
--I'm curious about seeing that whole movie now.
--Saying we *don't* live in a material world just because our perceptions of it differ is overly reductive at best.
--I'm glad they're making the asylum *obviously* fake. The "is it all just a dream" story gets tiring fast.

#5 "Asylum":
--A fantasy *inside* a fantasy. Fantaception.
--Props to the Ancestral Plane. Also, props to canonizing multiple different mythologies *and* their corresponding afterlifes being available.
--Marc trying to re-enter the bingo room. (2009, colorized)
--Those hearts look suspiciously like marble rocks.
--Pretty sure the imbalance is because somebody's missing. That 3rd sarcophagus seemed pretty important.
--These are but shadows of the things that have been, Steven. They have no consciousness of you.
--How many floors does this house have?
--And so it begins again for the first time for the last time.
--Doc Harrow is accidentally helping. Love it.
--Oh, THAT'S why she never calls back. Oy vey.
--Inter-company promotional tactic: Watch The Simpsons, now streaming on Disney+(TM)(C)(R).
--Let's pretend the asylum is real for a sec: This is an incredibly mean trick, Doc.
--Six runs.
--Hold up, what was the point of the sharp turn of the boat earlier to head back to the living world, if they came to the Field of Reeds anyway?

#6 "Gods and Monsters":
--Meanwhile, this guy's dead.
--YOU DIDN'T GIVE LAYLA THE SHABTI!?
--Gator-axe is nowhere near as cool as shotgun-axe.
--And you guys don't think this roadblock is gonna be suspicious about you suddenly pulling out of the desert?
--"Somebody is trying to free Ammit." IF ONLY WE HAD BEEN WARNED.
--Hey, Arthur, the other gods are gonna be pissed that you killed their avatars.
--Hey, Arthur, doncha think it's sketchy that Ammit wants an avatar who *doesn't fulfill her own criteria*?
--Inside my head when Layla frees Khonshu.
--Slifer isn't so much "soft" as he is "furious".
--Calamawy is finally getting to have some of the fun that Isaac has been having.
--So...that's a lot of people's souls getting gobbled.
--This is a really cool fight.
--Randall's death was an accident, not a sin. You are unquestionably wrong, Harrow.
--We're still blacking out, eh? Big Jake's still lurking.
--You can't fake us out anymore with the asylum. Hell, Doc Harrow can't even fake *himself* out.
--Wait, where did Layla go then?
--Mid-credit scene: Oh, this is poetic. "Somehow, Moon Knight returned."

Executive summary: First & foremost, this is a utterly magnificent performance by Oscar Isaac, with a wonderful lead cast across the board. Secondly, there were some outstanding design choices, & some very fun/poignant writing choices made throughout the season. Third, some of the visuals didn't *quite* work, but the CG gods all looked spectacular. As far as timeline placement goes, all we really have to work off of here is "after Endgame" & that museum poster, so I'm just gonna default to using the release sequence to put in spring 2025.


And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

^I somehow forgot to make a "wrong kid died" joke in episode 5. I have brought shame & disgrace upon my dojo.

But anyway, speaking of She-Hulk, here's the first trailer for She-Hulk: Attorney at Law:

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[I REALLY HATE POKEMON!]

If there's no Harvey Birdman cameo in there somewhere I'll be disappointed.

[CaptHayfever]

News & updates:
Multiverse of Madness hits D+ on June 22nd.
We have a poster & release date: August 10th.

So the current schedule for the rest of 2022 is as follows...
--8 Jun: Ms. Marvel premieres on D+ (that's THIS WEDNESDAY!)
--8 Jul: Thor: Love & Thunder opens in theaters
--10 Aug: I Am Groot full-season release on D+
--17 Aug: She-Hulk: Attorney at Law premieres on D+
--?? Oct: TBA Halloween special (*most likely* Werewolf By Night) on D+
--11 Nov: Black Panther: Wakanda Forever opens in theaters
--?? Dec: Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special on D+

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

The first episode of Ms. Marvel rocked!
Tickets for Love & Thunder are now for sale!

Also, news: The heavily-implied Thunderbolts movie is now confirmed, with Jake Schreier directing & Eric Pearson (Marvel Studios' in-house script doctor) writing the screenplay. The cast is purely speculative at this point, but it will almost certainly include Florence Pugh (Yelena Belova/Black Widow), Wyatt Russell (John Walker/US Agent), & Julia Louis-Dreyfus (Contessa Valentina Allegra de Fontaine) reprising their roles.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

Another new content announcement: Destin Daniel Cretton, fresh off his success with Shang-Chi, is developing a Wonder Man series.
And now, part 65....


Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness:

--Meanwhile in some kind of Subspace Emissary patchwork existence, Strange looks *really* different.
--America Chavez is in this movie, but it's a crossover, not her solo work, so I don't have to worry about Gabby Rivera's craptacular dialogue.
--Yeah, ties are nonsense.
--That guy inching away from Strange so West can sit next to him is hilarious.
--West, he literally looked at 14 million outcomes & only found 1 victory. Cope, you bitter jerk.
--If you can't go to your ex's wedding without declaring love for her after the ceremony, then don't go. At least he's not being bitter like Nick.
--Strange plays Kirby.
--Narokath Redgormor Ulyaoth.
--Did that thing just trumpet like an elephant?
--My brain when I see a green fireball.
--Star stomp.
--Pop.
--Wong's little wiggle of his own "slingie" was priceless.
--Where did the movie's built-in subtitles go? I don't like when those go away. Caption the Spanish instead.
--It means dreams *can be* a window into other lives, not that they *must be*.
--Dat Devil's Interval tho. She's definitely dreaming. This makes a good easter-egg reference to WandaVision, but it still makes sense so far without the show.
--"The Darkhold only showed me the truth" is almost verbatim what everyone who used it on AoS said.
--This wasn't the justification he used for giving Thanos the Time Stone. It was the justification he used for letting Tony Stark die.
--That's a Raimi scene transition.
--Where did this minotaur guy come from?
--Where did the movie's built-in subtitles go? I don't like when those go away. Caption the Chinese instead.
--It is nowhere near sundown, Wanda; you're early.
--Those are some disturbingly charred corpses.
--Mirror dimension trap FTW.
--Oof, her fingers are crisping just like Agatha's.
--I call shenanigans on the gong; it's not reflective at all! Creepy entrance, though.
--"What happens to their mother?" is exactly the right question.
--Universe montage! I see: normal, big floating tribunal heads, Galeem, Shifting Sand Land, Fortress of Solitude, BEES, Aquitar, normal, a literal ad for Evil Dead's distributor, Pipe Land, a big pile of bones, Jurassic Park, Toon Town, some kind of bombed-out ruin, cubism, Splatoon, old-timey noir, M.C. Escher's brain, futuristic noir, Bag O' Glass, & Mustafar.
--Hi, Bruce!
--The Utopian Parallel, a world outside of the universe. America's two moms are both biological.
--Sure would've been nice for us to SEE some of main-universe Mordo trying to kill Strange.
--Is Mordo casting an ominous-atmosphere spell?
--Nice "What was in that tea?" callback.
--Raimi cam! This is some massive Evil Dead vibes right here.
--This is massively authentic little-kids-making-up-a-song-with-no-prep. Nice touch.
--Ok, Wanda, you know Wong didn't do it.
--She brought them back to life just to kill them again, dang.
--A copy? So there could be more than 1 Darkhold per universe.
--"Mount Wundagore" sounds like it belongs in that cartoon universe.
--I hate that they're calling MCU-Prime "616". Like, I get if they want the film multiverse to be completely separate from the print multiverse, but this retroactively makes 14 years' worth of discourse on the topic more confusing, unless Disney's got somebody going through ALL of the internet editing every mention of "616" to include the word "comic" for clarity. There are so many unused numbers they could've picked instead.
--Baxter Foundation?
--WHY ULTRON BOTS!?
--Wanda complains about not getting portaled all the way, but she was able to just fly over the rough part anyway.
--This clearly isn't the same Captain Carter from What If; she was in a very different position when we last saw her.
--Raise your hand if you ever expected to see even a VARIANT of Black Bolt again. (*keeps hand down*)
--In this universe, Mar-Vell flew with Maria rather than with Carol.
--Jimmy Woo!?
--There actually was a 60s band called the Fantastic Four.
--I know that theme song....but why "97", Caption Guy?
--Tether recoveries suck.
--The sugar coma is real.
--Get out of my head, Charles!
--oh look it's exactly what Strange warned you about whoever could have predicted this threat
--Mordo, I'm gonna trust the telepath when it comes to whose intentions are true.
--"There will be someone left to raise them" is such a cold-blooded line.
--Pop.
--Pop. We're really pushing the limits of PG-13 here.
--I just never realized until just this moment how easy it is to cut someone in half with a machete shield.
--How did Maria get depowered here?
--Strange was always a more creative thinker than Mordo.
--Another star strike.
--I love that Xavier's mental image of himself can always walk.
--Brain death.
--Nice patch job on the cloak. Could've at least tried for the same color?
--Wanda's Die-Harding it out here.
--Jump-scare warning.
--Meanwhile in some kind of Subspace Emissary patchwork existence, Strange forgot to CLOSE THE DOOR BEHIND HIMSELF.
--The much-hyped Book of Vishanti did literally nothing, just like Captain Phasma.
--Proof that Wanda could actually get EVERYTHING she wants WITHOUT killing America.
--Strange gets a bit of George Bailey's backstory.
--It's not his Christine, dude, in any sense of the word.
--Music battle!
--I hate spike-top fences.
--Forget "how is Wong alive;" the more pertinent question is "how did his magic rope stay active while he was unconscious?"
--The camerawork, the voiceover work, the music, Zombie Strange looks exactly like a deadite....Sam Raimi took Marvel's money & made Evil Dead 4.
--America's only problem was that her focus was all brokus.
--Captions: "Dead Strange"
--Wanda is more forgiving of Wanda than even Wanda herself is. RIP...?
--No more Darkholds at all anywhere, nice.
--I think Wong's comments about happiness are really important. We might not have everything we want, but we can still enjoy what we do have. And of course, that's not to say we should never fight for more, but rather that we need to weigh the costs.
--Not wearing a watch that could constantly cut you with broken glass shards. Good life lesson learned, Stephen.
--I want something else to get me through this semi-charmed kind of life.
--Mid-credits scene: Well, he got over that pretty quickly. Wait, who's this Dark Dimension lady? It'd be nice if they said her name somewhere other than the captions that most people won't turn on. (And the same goes for minotaur guy.)
--Credits: The ice cream song got a composer credit.
--Post-credits scene: It's over!

Executive summary: Such a weird & amazing movie. Definitely better than the first one. A lot of bold choices. Enrapturing performances by Cumberbatch & Olsen.


And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

News time!
--Thor: Love & Thunder opens TODAY! It's mostly great!
--The finale of Ms. Marvel comes out WEDNESDAY! It's mostly great!
--The yet-untitled Captain America 4 has hired Julius Onah to direct.
--Per info from the costume designer, Charlie Cox (Daredevil) & Vincent D'Onofrio (Kingpin) will return in Echo.
--In September, there will be a brief theatrical re-release of No Way Home that includes deleted scenes that were left off of the blu-ray & digital releases.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[I REALLY HATE POKEMON!]

That's a little weird, I wonder why they'd not include those deleted scenes on disc.

[CaptHayfever]

^So they could bait people into buying another ticket.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[I REALLY HATE POKEMON!]

Hm, that makes sense, is that common though?

[CaptHayfever]

No, not at all. Disney did it with Endgame, but (a) that was really just an extension of its then-still-current theatrical run, (b) the disc/download versions weren't even out yet, (c) there was only ONE exclusive scene, (d) they only did it because it was *just about* to break Avatar's record at the time, & (e) they still got it OUT of theaters before the next MCU film opened.
Then Sony tried the same thing a few months later with Far From Home, but the only extra footage was the scenes from "Peter's To-Do List" stuck onto the beginning of the film, & that short *was* on the disc.

Other than that, the only thing even close that I can think of are things like Snyder Cut Justice League (but I don't think that even hit theaters) or all the recuts of Blade Runner that got brief theater stints.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

The Ms. Marvel finale drops tomorrow!

And the following Emmy nominations came out today:
--Loki (6) - Period/Fantasy Series Costume Design, Single-Camera Cinematography, Sci-Fi/Fantasy Costumes, Original Score, Main Title Theme, Sound Editing
--What If? (3) - Outstanding Animated Program, Voice-Over Performance (2 nominations: Boseman & Wright)
--Hawkeye (2) - Stunt Coordination, Stunt Performance
--Moon Knight (8) - Limited Series Cinematography, Sci-Fi/Fantasy Costumes, Original Score, Voice-Over Performance (Abraham), Sound Editing, Sound Mixing, Stunt Coordination, Stunt Performance

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

It's Comic-Con, everybody! Marvel Studios has their live-action panel tomorrow evening, & their animation panel was earlier today, with the following news:

* I Am Groot S1 will be 5 shorts, all dropping on August 10th.
--Diesel & Cooper return as Groot & Rocket.
--Here's a trailer.
--I Am Groot has already been renewed for a 2nd season of 5 more shorts.

* What If? S2 will premiere in early 2023, featuring another 9 episodes.
--These include another Captain Carter story, a Hela story, Odin versus the Mandarin, & Tony Stark on Sakaar (this may connect to the warlord Gamora seen in S1).
--What If? has also now been renewed for a 3rd season.

* Marvel Zombies, a direct spinoff from What If?, will debut in 2024.
--It will be the first TV-MA rated project from Marvel Studios, & the first such MCU project since the Netflix shows ended in 2019 (since Helstrom was decanonized before its release).
--Characters from phase 4 projects (Black Widow, Shang-Chi, Eternals, Hawkeye, Ms. Marvel) will appear in it as well as past characters.

* Spider-Man: Freshman Year will debut in 2024.
--While previously described as an origin prequel for MCU Peter Parker before Civil War, this will now instead be an alternate universe.
--Other characters appearing will include Norman & Harry Osborn, Doctor Octopus, Scorpion, Chameleon, Rhino, Amadeus Cho, Nico Minoru, & Daredevil (voiced by Charlie Cox).
--The season will lead straight into its universe's version of "Civil War", with the already-renewed 2nd season to be retitled Sophomore Year.

* X-Men '97, a direct continuation of the 90s X-Men cartoon, will debut in fall 2023.
--It has already been renewed for a 2nd season.
--Any further details will spoil the old show if you haven't seen it.

Tomorrow evening, I'll summarize the live-action panel & post my liveblog of Ms. Marvel!

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

Major points from tonight's live-action panel:
--Phases 4-6 are now officially "The Multiverse Saga".
--New trailer for She-Hulk: Attorney at Law. Yes, that's Daredevil.
--"Phase 4" ends with Black Panther: Wakanda Forever (first trailer), releasing 11/11, featuring most of the returning cast (minus Boseman, Kani, & Kaluuya), plus Dominique Thorne as Ironheart & Tenoch Huerta as Namor.
--"Phase 5" kicks off with Ant-Man & the Wasp: Quantumania on 17 Feb 2023, featuring MODOK in addition to the previously-announced cast.
--Secret Invasion premieres on D+ in spring 2023, & will feature War Machine in addition to the previously-announced cast.
--Guardians of the Galaxy vol. 3 opens 5 May 2023, features Will Poulter as Adam Warlock, Chukwudi Iwuji as the High Evolutionary, & Maria Bakalova as Cosmo the Spacedog. Will be the end of the story for the current team of Guardians, but Gunn promises they won't all die.
--Echo & S2 of Loki will both premiere on D+ in summer 2023.
--The Marvels opens 28 July 2023.
--Ironheart premieres on D+ in fall 2023.
--Blade opens 3 Nov 2023.
--The series previously subtitled "House of Harkness" is now Agatha: Coven of Chaos, & will premiere on D+ in winter 2023/2024.
--Daredevil: Born Again, an 18-episode D+ series starring Charlie Cox & Vincent D'Onofrio, will premiere in spring 2024.
--Captain America: New World Order starring Anthony Mackie opens 3 May 2024.
--"Phase 5" ends with Thunderbolts, opening 26 July 2024.
--"Phase 6" kicks off with Fantastic Four, opening 8 November 2024.
--Avengers: The Kang Dynasty opens 5 May 2025.
--Just 6 months later on 7 November 2025, Avengers: Secret Wars ends "Phase 6".
--There are 8 other release slots scheduled for "Phase 6", but no projects were announced to fill those yet. We do, however, already know of the following 6 projects that still await release dates: Deadpool 3 (film starring Ryan Reynolds which will begin shooting soon), Shang-Chi 2 (film), Armor Wars (D+ series starring Don Cheadle), some kind of D+ series focusing on Okoye, Wonder Man (D+ series), & Nova (D+ series).

This was a lot longer than I expected. I'll save the Ms. Marvel liveblog another day or two.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

In light of some recent examinations, it appears my last two timeline placements were wrong. The correct numbers are as follows:
Moon Knight is part 61.9.
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness is part 63.5.
And that means *this* is part 65....


Ms. Marvel:

#1 "Generation Why":
--Naming the episodes after Kamala's trade paperbacks is a subtle nod to the fact that her comics sell MUCH better in those collected volumes (& digitally) than in "floppies". The generation she appeals to can't afford monthly comic issues.
--Ooh, I love "Take On Me"!
--The band-aid on Cap's head is a nice touch.
--Just remember, Scott, some jokes don't work in the podcast medium.
--Wait,...is Kamala......Noobmaster69!?
--New episodes on Wednesdays. Very clever.
--Every 15 seconds is a bit much, but you do need to make sure you're in the right gear.
--Interestingly, Yusef & Muneeba's roles are reversed from the comics: There he was the strict one & she was the encouraging one.
--Douchebags blocking other people's lockers. Been there.
--What a terrible counselor to prank you to the whole school.
--Timeline cue: Trees look like fall.
--If Halal Guys is anything like Five Guys, then I agree it's overpriced.
--Timeline cue: Food truck guy's last inspection was in March 2025.
--Sorry, Bruno, there is no escaping the food.
--Wait, why would the convention be at night?
--All the background animations & the texting effects are awesome.
--Yusef's Hulk costume is actually a great idea. The mini-Hulk costume, not so much. Kamala's reaction, even less so.
--"You're not going to dress up like all those other girls in skimpy outfits." You're right, she's not, because her cosplay isn't *REMOTELY* skimpy.
--Kamala, you skipped step 1 of this plan: *Why* will your family be celebrating your existence?
--I know Chicago buses *don't* close doors while people are in them, & they still stay on time. (And StL buses are late anyway, so it doesn't matter.) Do Jersey buses close on people?
--Costume contest: Kamala has one of the better outfits here. Zoe's is clearly a store-bought morph suit.
--I'm not a huge fan of making Kamala's powers so...pretty. They should be unsettling-looking, at least to the other characters if not also to the audience.
--Yeah, there was NO way you were gonna be back by 9:20, even if the plan had gone well.
--Credits: Loving the comic art integration.
--Mid-credits scene: Creepers.

#2 "Crushed":
--Confidence. Pass it on.
--Finally an in-universe "Paul Rudd doesn't age" joke.
--Night Monkey Light
--Ok, good, the bangle isn't the actual power source; that's a relief.
--Was that a tile breaking?
--Never mind the gender policies of Islam, not getting into that...but Nakia is a child; how is she even eligible for the council?
--Sorry, Bruno, there is no escaping the adolescent heartbreak.
--So, did they change Kamran's power to manifesting doodles?
--We don't talk about Brian, no no no.
--Kamala, with your nose so bright, won't you guide my sleigh tonight?
--My best friends in high school remained my best friends when we went to different colleges, & they're still my best friends now. You're gonna be ok, Bruno.
--Kingo movies are pretty tight.
--0% chance Tyesha believed that story. 50/50 on Aamir.
--I only know a little bit about Partition, but IIRC, Gandhi adamantly opposed it; he wanted the different religious groups of India to learn to coexist instead. But he got assassinated.
--So, Nani had powers too.
--Super traditional Ammi is a Bon Jovi fanatic.
--The Illumin-Aunties better be glad the Scarlet Witch is dead.
--These Damage Control guys are real pieces of work. For one thing, nobody says "Latinx".
--This may not be one of the movies with Gemma Chan or Awkwafina in it, but this scene has SUPER Crazy Rich Asians vibes.
--If banana pudding on pizza works, then I'm sure ice cream on pizza would work.
--These Damage Control guys are real idiots. For one thing, how did they not see that car?

#3 "Destined":
--Flashback: 1942. Bloody hell, the Ten Rings!?
--Another dimension. Seriously.
--So the lot of them don't age, but their offspring do.
--Kamala, kiddo, that's not how cause & effect work.
--...Djinn. Freaking genies. What.
--Ok, yeah, Damage Control is officially our new ATCU.
--Tyesha's reaction to the size of Aamir's family reminds me of my wife's reaction to the size of my family.
--"Good is not a thing you are, Kamala. It is a thing you do."
--Timeline cue: September calendar in the Circle Q.
--"If you help them go home, some things might go boom" reminds me of Runaways.
--Great speeches from the parents here.
--"We don't have more time"? You're immortal. Just wait until tomorrow!
--I've never seen a Muslim wedding before; it's kinda neat.
--Hi, Sana Amanat!
--The Hulkling costume returns!
--Brown Jovi: The New-Jerseyest band since E Street.
--I see what you did there, music coordinator.
--Now Damage Control can't even turn their heads to the left.
--Kamala, there's a partial truth you can tell here that would help your family a lot.

#4 "Seeing Red":
--This is the only episode title not to come from a Ms. Marvel trade paperback.
--Muneeba agreed to the flight!?
--I use ginger ale to settle my stomach on flights too.
--"What kind of grounding allows you to still have your cell phone?" ~my wife
--Yeah, don't bring people to a place with a dress code unless you TELL THEM about the dress code first.
--Yeah, you don't leave a child alone in a busy marketplace in a city they've never been to, wholly at the mercy of scammers to find her way.
--Red Dagger's a pretty cool guy, eh throws knives & doesn't afraid of anything.
--"How do you know I'm not Canadian?" I see what you did there.
--"The Red Daggers"? Why does everything have to be a secret organization? Why can't he just be a lone vigilante?
--Ah, so she's *not* actually a djinn.
--Meanwhile elsewhere, Damage Control needs to learn how to detain prisoners, & Kamran needs to learn that his mother sucks.
--Sometimes spicy food is good. Sometimes it isn't. Not EVERYTHING needs to be spicy.
--We continue Disney's recent theme of generational trauma.
--"A child of two worlds." Wicked.
--So the Clandestines have teleport-halfway-around-the-world powers?
--Kinda loving this chase scene.
--Glad they're not shying away from knives being a lethal weaping, but Waleed died really fast from a stab to the shoulder.
--Did we really just end the episode trapped in a flashback?

#5 "Time & Again":
--Every newsreel ever reminds me of A League of Their Own.
--Flashback: 1942. The British Empire was the worst.
--Aisha throwing a dagger seems familiar to me.
--Jump to 1947. It's a good thing they showed the riot threat actually approaching, or else we'd be left with the implication that Aisha pushed Hasan out of his home JUST because of Najma, which would really hurt the theme of this story.
--Wait, this is actual time travel!?
--Present day: How the heck did the veil open? Is the other bangle here? And the chase scene just happened to end up at the Veil, despite Kamala not knowing it would be there, Kareem actively trying to avoid going there, and the ClanDestines not in control of which way Kamala & Kareem ran?
--Welp, that didn't work. Thank goodness the ClanDestines are all gone...with an episode & a half left.
--Wait, did she possess her own kid!?
--Kareem nopes out of this awkward conversation, as well he should.
--I much prefer how Muneeba finds out in the comics: She just figures it out on her own.
--"So you're a car guy as well?" Wow, Kamran.
--Tragic things are afoot at the Circle Q.
--Very awkward ending.
--Credits: I just realized the title image is on a different intersection every time.

#6 "No Normal":
--Ope, there's the spoilery school-shooting disclaimer again.
--"This is what happens when kids get powers; we try to shoot them illegally but miss & blow up businesses."
--My dad always has his phone on speaker; I try not to discuss Mom's Christmas/birthday presents with him. (I had to keep my phone on speaker for a while because the earpiece was cracked, but as soon as I could get a free upgrade I stopped doing that.)
--Why is this a Facetime at all?
--Why are we not panning down to Najaf spilling the sauce everywhere?
--rejecting powers
--TAKE OFF YOUR GORRAM SHOES.
--Reminds me of the time a bunch of people called the Declaration of Independence "fake news".
--I forgot this dorky kid existed.
--The hats are hilarious, but why does he have them?
--This suit looks amazing.
--I'll bet you $50 we never see the "someone who can get him out."
--We never really saw bully-Zoe at all.
--r/UnexpectedAamir
--Use the thing on the side to break the glass!
--Kamala, dear, Zoe being on the softball team is a hint that she doesn't want to grab any balls.
--Cleary is a jerk, but he's a reasonable jerk. Deever is a raging bigoted douchebag.
--There's an important point that Kamala isn't making; she didn't kill ANY of the ClanDestines. The Red Daggers killed a couple, & the veil itself killed the others.
--RIP Zuzu.
--Science rules.
--Kamran, your legs are sticking out.
--Stop taking off your mask!!!
--Police brutality.
--"She was trying to save our world. My home." First of all, you've never been there. Secondly, that world didn't need saving; it wasn't in danger.
--The Hulk cannons!
--YES FINALLY GROSS LOOKING ENLARGED LIMBS
--"They're never going to accept you" except that they're already accepting her, but go off.
--Whoa, a law enforcement officer facing immediate repercussions for wrongdoing? That's how you know this is fiction.
--Hi, G. Willow Wilson!
--The naming scene here is sweet.
--One week later: It's weird to me that Bruno would start the CalTech program in the middle of a school year. Wait, did they just say...?
--Mid-credit scene: How'd they switch places?

Executive summary: Vellani is perfect. I like the dialogue & thematic work & design & action, but some significant plot beats seemed to have been cut for no reason, resulting in the story feeling super rushed when it didn't need to (Marvel needs to remember that streaming doesn't need to fit time slots). Also, the writers seem to have no sense of how long it takes to travel between New Jersey, Floriday, & Pakistan. Changing Kamala to a mutant works because it keeps the important racial analogy without contradicting anything from Agents of SHIELD. The ClanDestines were awful, though.


And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

Quick schedule updates:
Season 1 (the first 5 shorts) of I Am Groot drops *this* Wednesday.
She-Hulk: Attorney at Law now has its season premiere on August 18th, which is a week from *Thursday*, which will be the day all the subsequent episodes come out.
And we are just over 3 months from the opening of Black Panther: Wakanda Forever.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

James Gunn said on Twitter recently that I Am Groot was not going to be canon to "the Guardians saga". Disney+ has, however, put the first batch of shorts on its MCU Timeline playlist. Clearly one of the two is mistaken, but either way, it won't hurt to label this part 18.5....


I Am Groot "season 1":

#1 "Groot's First Steps":
--The full logo animation on a 6-minute short?...oh, thank goodness.
--This short is clearly set between GotG 1 & 2.
--Spider-Groot.
--NGL, I feel kinda bad for the bonsai tree...oh, thank goodness.

#2 "The Little Guy":
--Oh, they're doing this joke every time?
--Big Spongebob energy on these timecards.
--Big Gulliver's Travels energy on the rest of it.

#3 "Groot's Pursuit":
--We're on the Quadrant, so it's clearly now after GotG 2.
--It's a little bit Alex Mack, a little bit Mario Sunshine.
--...& a little bit Other Space.

#4 "Groot Takes a Bath":
--Ok, the logo gag is getting old now.
--Remember in Mother 3 when [massive spoilers]? This is like that, without the illusion.
--I Am Chia.
--I think this shot was lifted directly from Cinderella.
--Rainbow Squirrelbird has no chill...until it does.

#5 "Magnum Opus":
--Rocket looks off.
--The finished portrait is actually significantly better than I expected.
--The last 2.5 minutes of this "5" minute short being credits is kinda annoying with the way the D+ interface works.

Executive summary: Charming. Funny. Inconsequential.


And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

Today - Episode 2 of She-Hulk: Attorney at Law
The next several Thursdays - the rest of the season of She-Hulk
September 8th - Thor: Love & Thunder hits streaming
September 9th, 10th, & 11th - D23 Expo, where we're likely to *finally* get concrete info on the upcoming Halloween special, & possibly also more info on the Phase 6 schedule

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

[CaptHayfever]

The Marvel Studios panel happened today at D23. A lot of it was repetition & fluff, but there were a few significant new points of interest:

* The all-but-confirmed Halloween special was finally announced: Werewolf By Night will release on D+ on October 7th (that's just under 4 weeks from now)! Here's a trailer.
* We also got a trailer for Secret Invasion.
* Captain America: New World Order will see the return of Tim Blake Nelson as the Leader (reprising his role from The Incredible Hulk), Carl Lumbly returns as Isaiah Bradley & Danny Ramirez as Joaquin Torres (both from Falcon & Winter Soldier), and the film will also feature Shira Haas as Sabra.
* The Thunderbolts lineup has finally been announced: Yelena Belova/Black Widow, Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier, Ava Starr/Ghost, Toni Dreykov/Taskmaster, Alexei Shostakov/Red Guardian, & Contessa Valentina Allegra de Fontaine.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"