No. I do not like to be touched. That's final. "No" means "no".
Moderator: Saria Dragon of the Rain Wilds
- Sim Kid
- Member
- Posts: 13761
- Joined: Fri Jul 13, 2001 1:00 am
- Location: The state of Denial
- Been thanked: 59 times
No. I do not like to be touched. That's final. "No" means "no".
I hate to be touched. It's not just strangers or people I am barely familiar with - I don't even like when my own family touches me. I am close to thirty, and they are still shocked when I inform them that before they touch me, they must ask themselves these questions:
1) Are you in danger?
2) Am I in danger?
3) Will You, I, or someone else be harmed if my personal space is not invaded?
If the answer to one of those questions is "no", then you should not go through with the physical contact. I do not like it. Note a hint that I am giving to you - I do not initiate physical contact. I keep a healthy distance. This is a hint, people. A social cue. If someone does not do something to you, then you should probably not do it to them.
I have done pretty much everything to tell people who think I am an interactive museum exhibit that "no" means "no"... short of The Elbow, which I really do not want to resort to unless the person doing it really deserves it.
1) Are you in danger?
2) Am I in danger?
3) Will You, I, or someone else be harmed if my personal space is not invaded?
If the answer to one of those questions is "no", then you should not go through with the physical contact. I do not like it. Note a hint that I am giving to you - I do not initiate physical contact. I keep a healthy distance. This is a hint, people. A social cue. If someone does not do something to you, then you should probably not do it to them.
I have done pretty much everything to tell people who think I am an interactive museum exhibit that "no" means "no"... short of The Elbow, which I really do not want to resort to unless the person doing it really deserves it.
- Random User
- Member
- Posts: 13217
- Joined: Sat Jun 06, 2009 11:54 am
- Location: SECRET BASE INSIDE SNAKE MOUNTAIN
- Has thanked: 70 times
- Been thanked: 41 times
- Contact:
- United Nations
- Member
- Posts: 13210
- Joined: Thu Jun 29, 2006 3:54 pm
- Location: If you see a stranger, follow him.
- Has thanked: 62 times
- Been thanked: 34 times
I'm a touchy-feely kind of person. I love hugs and high fives and all that. I will say though that I'm weird about public displays of affection. I'm not someone who needs to constantly have an arm around me or a hand on my knee or a hand in my hand. But then sometimes in the mood for that stuff. I don't know. Maybe I'm just weird. :p
- RinkuTheFirst
- Member
- Posts: 6093
- Joined: Tue Jun 24, 2003 1:00 am
- Location: Bamamama
- Has thanked: 86 times
- Been thanked: 111 times
- Apollo the Just
- Member
- Posts: 16253
- Joined: Mon Jun 19, 2006 3:37 pm
- Location: Piccolo is Gohan's Real Dad
- Has thanked: 222 times
- Been thanked: 350 times
- Contact:
I used to be a huge touchy-huggy person, but recently I've become significantly less so. Now I don't mind hugs from people I'm really close to, specifically people I'm really close to who enjoy hugs, but otherwise I'm perfectly happy waving or acknowledging people from a distance. Hugs with people I don't know that well just feel forced and awkward. So it's less that I personally *actively dislike* physical contact, and more that I don't particularly get anything out of it except in certain circumstances. Overall I'm ok with it, but definitely seek it out less than I used to.
I believe in second chances, and that's why I believe in you.
- I REALLY HATE POKEMON!
- Member
- Posts: 33163
- Joined: Thu Jun 08, 2000 1:00 am
- Location: California, U.S.A
- Has thanked: 5568 times
- Been thanked: 498 times
- Apiary Tazy
- Member
- Posts: 29598
- Joined: Thu Sep 14, 2000 1:00 am
- Location: Flipping a Switch
- Has thanked: 41 times
- Been thanked: 173 times
- Contact:
I can't be within fifty feet of a human.
Not because I hate humanity but because of a restraining order from the human race. Not an easy thing to accomplish, that's for sure.
---
In all seriousness I really don't care that much about being touched. It tends to happen in crowds or when you walk past people. I don't let it bother me.
Not because I hate humanity but because of a restraining order from the human race. Not an easy thing to accomplish, that's for sure.
---
In all seriousness I really don't care that much about being touched. It tends to happen in crowds or when you walk past people. I don't let it bother me.
- United Nations
- Member
- Posts: 13210
- Joined: Thu Jun 29, 2006 3:54 pm
- Location: If you see a stranger, follow him.
- Has thanked: 62 times
- Been thanked: 34 times
[QUOTE="Sim Kid, post: 1612475, member: 22276"]Why would you say you are weird?
Some people like contact but others don't. That's the thing.[/QUOTE]
I think I just mean I'm weird because I like it and I don't. It's almost like I have to be in the mood for it when it comes to PDA with a partner, whereas I'm fine with anyone else hugging me or putting their arm around me.
Some people like contact but others don't. That's the thing.[/QUOTE]
I think I just mean I'm weird because I like it and I don't. It's almost like I have to be in the mood for it when it comes to PDA with a partner, whereas I'm fine with anyone else hugging me or putting their arm around me.
- Antisocial
- Member
- Posts: 14304
- Joined: Wed May 10, 2000 1:00 am
- Been thanked: 12 times
Haphephobia is just one of those things people can't wrap their head around for some reason. Unfortunately, it seems to be one of those many things other people would demand justification for before they label you as some sort of freak.
It's like they don't realize you can be close to someone without actually ever having to touch them.
It's like they don't realize you can be close to someone without actually ever having to touch them.
- ScottyMcGee
- Member
- Posts: 5896
- Joined: Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:28 pm
- Location: New Jersey
- Has thanked: 154 times
- Been thanked: 147 times
- Contact:
- Marilink
- Member
- Posts: 44022
- Joined: Sun Aug 26, 2001 1:00 am
- Location: avatar credit @SkyeRoxy_ on Twitter
- Has thanked: 239 times
- Been thanked: 514 times
- Contact:
I'm not quite dumb enough to touch people that I don't know well enough to know whether they'll sue me for it.
I'm talking about my friends that sometimes I forget when they don't like being touched, so the response is more of a "Dude, pls" rather than "I'll see you in court."
It's not like I'm hugging random passers-by here
I'm talking about my friends that sometimes I forget when they don't like being touched, so the response is more of a "Dude, pls" rather than "I'll see you in court."
It's not like I'm hugging random passers-by here
Carthago delendum est
- Booyakasha
- Supermod
- Posts: 21672
- Joined: Tue Nov 07, 2000 2:00 am
- Location: Wisconsinland
- Has thanked: 443 times
- Been thanked: 2081 times
I'm not overly fond of being touched. Had someone sort of slap me on the shoulder at work yesterday after I helped him find something. Like, a jolly send-off, right. Only I'd have been more pleased not to have him touch me. There's ways to be chummy without invading someone's space, putting your grubby mitts on him. Like what's to say that guy didn't come into the store straightaway after bathing his hands in a mixture of ebola, AIDS and the Black Death for a couple hours. Why would I want Typhoid Mary making physical contact with an article of clothing I couldn't immediately tear off and burn, right.
I can tolerate physical contact with family and friends. Girl cousins will buss me on both cheeks. Boy cousins and uncles do the 'handshake plus violent backslapping hug' thing. The kids climb up into my lap and command me to change over to 'Teen Titans Go', because kids have crap taste in entertainment. Emmy falls asleep on my shoulder and drools formula all over my shirt. Maxy slips his hand into mine at the museum when we're going past the 'T-Rex eating a triceratops' diorama, and I slip my hand into his at the terrifying witch-doctor masks display (them things are a nightmare in Technicolour, man).
Strangers, though, right. Like, I went to 'Man of La Mancha' a week ago Saturday, and I had to sort of pull myself away from the left side of my seat, because the person next to me was a giant pudding of a man who overflowed his own seat. I should have gotten a quarter of my ticket price refunded because I had Jabba the Hutt next to me takin up more than his share of the playhouse at my expense. Ugh.
I can tolerate physical contact with family and friends. Girl cousins will buss me on both cheeks. Boy cousins and uncles do the 'handshake plus violent backslapping hug' thing. The kids climb up into my lap and command me to change over to 'Teen Titans Go', because kids have crap taste in entertainment. Emmy falls asleep on my shoulder and drools formula all over my shirt. Maxy slips his hand into mine at the museum when we're going past the 'T-Rex eating a triceratops' diorama, and I slip my hand into his at the terrifying witch-doctor masks display (them things are a nightmare in Technicolour, man).
Strangers, though, right. Like, I went to 'Man of La Mancha' a week ago Saturday, and I had to sort of pull myself away from the left side of my seat, because the person next to me was a giant pudding of a man who overflowed his own seat. I should have gotten a quarter of my ticket price refunded because I had Jabba the Hutt next to me takin up more than his share of the playhouse at my expense. Ugh.
boo--------------a real american weirdo
- Calamity Panfan
- Member
- Posts: 35186
- Joined: Wed Jun 08, 2005 1:00 am
- Location: all posters post posts
- Has thanked: 124 times
- Been thanked: 549 times
I'm a touchy person with people I'm friends with but if I don't know somebody well and they break personal space barriers then I get super uncomfortable and squirmy. Like if I'm at a bar or restaurant and a bartender or server touches my shoulder or something, noooooope.
and that's the waaaaaaaaaay the news goes
- CaptHayfever
- Supermod
- Posts: 40590
- Joined: Tue Jul 16, 2002 1:00 am
- Location: (n) - the place where I am
- Has thanked: 1203 times
- Been thanked: 795 times
- Contact:
I get it if you're a grandparent with a very small grandchild or something, but for most people, I truly don't understand what's so hard about "please don't touch me". I'm a huggy person, but my best friend is not, so we don't hug unless she initiates it, which is almost never. This is not difficult at all for me.
And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"
And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"
- Booyakasha
- Supermod
- Posts: 21672
- Joined: Tue Nov 07, 2000 2:00 am
- Location: Wisconsinland
- Has thanked: 443 times
- Been thanked: 2081 times
We're social creatures, but we're individuals, as well. People are bound to be more reckless or timorous as far as touch goes, as far as personal space goes, just as a native part of that individuality. I couldn't hold it against somebody who opts to tap me on the shoulder instead of waving or saying 'hello', nevermind that I enjoy it less.
boo--------------a real american weirdo