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You know the drill. Anyone who isn't Vapor, Repster, or Inferno: You can challenge me in this topic. One person per topic, of course. Bring your own arena and first post, then I will respond.

If this continues to the point that I have a large list, I will begin allowing people to rematch me, but we're not yet that far.

OOC: I need more practice, so lets give this a go shall we ? I'm trying to strip my writing style to its bare bones. Not as much description and useless words. Now its more “lets get to the point” with a few pretty words peppered here and there for good measure.

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The darkness seemed almost infinite as he lay face up with his eyes wide open focusing on the lid of his coffin. For nearly five years his body has laid undisturbed with in this crypt, healing itself from the many wounds inflicted upon it by centuries of war. So many battles, so many enemies crushed beneath his boot, so many defeats at the hands of great warriors. The time for vengeance was at hand; the ancient vampire could resist his hunger no more and slowly he began to summon forth the power of his soul.

As the last of his energies returned and began infusing him with the familiar vibration of power, he knew that the time for him to walk the battlefields once more had arrived. The dreary lull of a half decades sleep began to recede from his mind as he breathed his first breath in many years. With the push of his breath the lid to his resting place slid open releasing a mixture of dust and stale air. A mysterious thick colored fog crept from the edges of the coffin and coated the dirt floor beneath it in an eerie purple glow. The vampire was now fully awake and thirsting for the blood of a worthy adversary. He sent his mind soaring through the vast recesses of space and time searching for one worthy of his vengeance. Finally his minds eyes came to rest upon a single warrior. One who’s blood and power would do well to serve him as his first meal. A wicked grin escaped the vampire’s face as he raised his hands to command the large stone doors of his tomb to swing open. Joker the Vampire Lord of Vengeance walked through the hall of his temple to greet the sea of fledgling vampires that awaited his return.

A thunderous roar of cheer erupted from the massive crowd of night stalkers. They waved their hands with frenzied excitement as he lifted himself into the air. He folded his hands over his chest and closed his eyes. The vampire pulled material from the black clouds over his home world and fashioned for him an all black tunic and hooded cloak. His stark white skin was a mesmerizing contrast to the dark apparel covering him. Joker looked down at his nation of minions and raised his right hand in triumph over the grave. A large flash of lightning broke from the night sky and with its following boom of thunder; Joker flew off towards his enemy. The feel of fresh air rushing passed him as he flew through the air like a missile was a warm reminder of how good it felt to fly. Higher and higher the vampire climbed into the air until he broke free of his home planets gravitational pull. Now fully engulfed in a flaming aura of purple energy he barreled through the cosmos at a speed that defied the laws of physics. As he streaked through the frigid wasteland of space a trail of very small rocks, comets and meteors followed him as his energy pulled them to his body.

Nearing the planet of his intended victim the vampire lord increased his speed ten fold and fanned out the flames of his energy. When Joker broke through the planets exosphere, he entered it with such burning force that his energy instantly ignited the many gases that resided in the upper most part of the planets atmosphere. Like a giant ring of fire that spread the world over, the skies of this world became engulfed in flames as the vampire struck the ground with ungodly force. Following the vampire lord’s descent was the long trail of cosmic junk that fell from the sky with equal speed. A shadowy figure rose out of the smoldering crater and roared a monstrous howl that shook the leaves from the trees around him. The vampire was in the middle of some wooded forest, on a planet he had never visited before.


He was a stranger to these lands, a pestilence sent to rid it of all its beauty and mystique. Patiently the undead warrior waited for his enemy to find him and begin the battle.

The Man in steel had been waiting there, remembering his foe from a time far gone...

His eyes glinted with mischief in the burning light, as he walked at the vampire lord as if he was nothing. A meteorite fell at his foot; he stomped it into rubble and continued on.

The shiny armageddon overhead lit up his reflecting silver armor well, as he clanked through the dirt and brush to see his newest opponent. He stopped exactly 10 meters away from the strange vampire, and lifted a finger, a comm-like device in his helmet screeching on as his metallic voice echoed out.

"So we meet again. Perhaps this time I shall be the one who drinks your blood, eh?"

Such strange words from a cyborg. But he appeared interested in doing the deed, for he suggestively waved two fingers of his chunky right hand by his throat.

"No life essence exists in me that you could handle, vampire. You yourself would go mad and die from the virtriolic putrescent vileness that surges in my veins. As I speak now, it screams for your death, your pieces to be torn apart. Why do I refrain when I posess the means for this?"

He walked up, wraithlike. He put his left hand up to the vampire's chin, moving his head up enough to get a good look at the blue visor. Behind that thin pane of blue glass was the visage of pure madness.

"Because I am sure..."

He stood back, holding his right hand to his side. The wind billowed, showing his orange cape, as a meteorite chunk barely missed his head/

"That I will break you."

He crossed his arms, confident in his powers, and... leaving himself open to whatever dark attack the vampire lord was likely to attempt. Gutsy move... but was it wise?

OOC: Okay I don’t know why but when I was thinking of a response to your post, I kept on thinking of it in the first person...I couldn’t separate myself from the actions I wanted to describe. So oh well....I don’t expect to write the remainder of my posts in this fashion.
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I could hear nothing. Only my rage and anger pounding in my ears like war drums. This fool simply stood before me, his hands crossed and awaiting punishment.

- Impudent son of a... -

I waved my hand across the air allowing for the psychic energy to snatch my enemy from his arrogant stance and send him flying wildly towards the right of me. I tensed my muscles for only a moment before releasing myself full speed into the direction of my opponent. My hand slid across the air ripping the very fabric of this dimension and pulling forth the silvery blade of my ancestors. I snatched the fool from his course as I intercepted him midway through his flight. My left hand seemed to almost swallow his guarded neck as I squeezed every ounce of strength through my fingers. I could hear the pressure of my hands strain the metal of his armor. With my right hand I sent flying the end tip of my blade through his gut. And with joy I released from my being the raw chi energy that burned like the flames of hell. Such an intense blast of dark energy at such close a range made for a wonderful display of combustion. Smoking like a tear gas can he went flying backwards leaving a trail white smoke behind. I raised my head to the heavens and summoned lightning from the clouds. Obeying my command a large thunderclap broke from the burning sky and shot forth a brilliant bolt of energy towards my opponent. I did not intend for the naked bolt of lighting to strike him all on its own. No, instead I wanted it to act in tandem with the energy now being released from my sword. The strength of my ancestors resonated with ardent fervor as they were released into the air and sent rushing towards my enemy. The twin bolts of energy struck together in unison directly into the wound opened by the venomus tip of my sword.

As the energies from the sky and sword struck him with their full force, I called out in a deep voice to the dark spirits of my world to bleed into his wound as it surged with two separate forms of power. Reacting with the raw energies the poison from my sword of vengeance sprang to life and immediately began working its way through the inside of his body. Of course by the end of all this he lay smoldering on the floor writhing from the painful sensation of some snake like liquid now coursing inside of him. I raised my left hand and faced my open palm towards the lying warrior. I called to the venom slithering inside of him. At my command several fountains of liquid broke from his skin and armor and poured itself into a puddle on the floor. His eyes blinded by the liquid seeping from his tear ducts struggled to see what was taking place before him. I closed my hand into a tight ball and in turn gave substance to the blood pooling at his feet. Like the T1000 the liquid pulled itself together forming an anthropomorphic body. Before the bleeding warrior stood an exact duplicate of himself.
.

“ Kill HIM !! ” I shouted

At the sound of my voice the doppleganger quickly grabbed his other half by the sides of his arms and brought him up to eye level. The unholy creature shot a knee deep into its counter parts mid section, expelling any air trapped with in his lungs. Then as the warrior fell to the floor once more, my pet unsheathed his weapon. As he loomed over his enemy, he raised his hands high above his head ready to strike his duplicate with all his might.

I stood watching from afar, waiting to see if this foolish warrior would react in time.

The Man layed on the ground, smoking and burning, bleeding and coughing. Yet for all the force used against him, the man simply got up and dusted himself off quietly, seemingly ignorant of his doppelganger. He spoke in a sly voice.

"My my, you are getting sloppy. All my body parts are still attached to my body? I'm afraid you're out of date now. Me... I replaced mine with the latest mod--"

The doppelganger flew at Metal Man. He made an incredibly powerful punch, aimed to knock Metal Man's head off. But the man of Steel walked directly at it! It hit the man of steel with a resounding clang. Metal bits flew everywhere. Clearly, he had punched through the man of steel's chest, and made a gigantic hole. Smoke was everywhere..
...
...

...But it was not so, as Metal Man stood there, glancing at the stump where the doppelganger's arm had been. Hundreds of feet behind the doppelganger was his shattered arm, Metal Man's chest shining once before the plates relaxed to show that they had come together for one purpose--repelling that attack. It was some kind of next-gen reactive armor--the kind which Metal Man had not used often. The man smirked as the sun glinted off his armor, as he grabbed his doppelganger by the neck and quickly kicked him in the middle, most likely sending him back, and, if he was lucky, chopping the fake in two with the sheer force.

He walked towards the Joker next, twirling his right hand in a mocking fashion.

"You know better than I that fake clones are the weakest summon magic. Perhaps if I were a fool it would have scared me; but instead, you have amused me. Your energy draining powers are also interesting--but relatively useless. For I derive my power from defense, not offense--there is but little to take from my already limited attack abilities."

He picked up the busted arm and chucked it over his shoulder.

"But enough talk. Now it is time to start the play!"

The tone of voice was that of somebody who'd completely lost their mind. A manic sort of laugh came from inside the seemingly posessed armor.

The man's right arm jerked violently, revealing a speaker. A song named Mach Rider began playing at a slow pace, its tortured notes slowed down as if time itself was tired.

Bobbing his head in tune to the music, Metal Man walked to his foe, and hurled a few slow punches. The Joker would only be hit if he was interested in being hit--they were slow... and synchronized?

The doleful music played on, serving no real purpose.

More punches came. The Joker could counter attack easily with this atmosphere. But, regardless of what Joker did, Metal Man kept on his dreary dance.

The surreal attacks would soon take on a sinister quality as the music hit an important crescendo...

doo doo dooh doo-doo-doo-doo-dooooooh. dooo dooo dooo doo doo doo dooo...

DOO DOOO DOOO DOO DOO DOOOOOH!!!!

The music spastically sped up to a manic speed. Metal's foe, likely used to the slow, dance-like punches, would be surprised to find hundreds of punches and kicks flying at him like mad. Metal Man threw his fists at every piece of the Joker he could hit--even intentionally punching parries and blocks, with the intent of literally smashing to bits everything that was before him.

Vents glowed red hot on the Man's shoulders as his music hit its second section. Now he was serious--he began to kick like a tornado in addition to his punches!

An earshattering amount of metallic joint noise crashed through the area, as hot air spewed from all the man's joints and the music twanged uncomfortably at a rate it was never intended to be played at. Metal growled loudly as he viciously punched ligaments, muscles, bones... face... armor... and anything else he could hit... until it was no longer hittable. But he decided that this was... lacking.

So he threw in some headbutts and continued thrashing like a top for a few more eternal moments.

At last he suddenly stopped and backed off, returning to a sage-like pose. Once again the music played at the slow pace. He took a moment to catch his breath and wipe the debris off his now filthy armor. Then he spoke like a crazed oracle.

"The second time I attack you... you shall most certainly die. The brightness of my technique is simply... unsurpassable."

He chuckled ominously, the sun reflecting on him in a way to suggest that he was acting as a conduit of some sort...

But any vampire could see that removal of this man's energy, by choking or otherwise, was causing strange side-effects instead of the desired weakness. There was a certain instability to his being--perhaps some sort of device on his person was doing this?

The dizzying speed and strength of Metal Man’s attack proved to be not only effective but shocking. It was difficult to anticipate his attacks as they were unorthodox and in synch with some mysterious beat that moved at random paces. Every part of Joker's body that came into contact with one of MM’s blows was bruised to the bone. His forehead bleeding from a wound that was freshly opened by his enemy’s final head but was proving to be more of a nuisance than the bruises to his body. Despite the many blows, this armored warrior was now offering the Vampire Lord a perfect opportunity to shake the rust from his hand to hand techniques.

His eyes narrowed on his opponent as the blood from his forehead trickled down the left side of his face. The vampire raised his arms in front of him assuming the long fist stance of Hung Gar Shaolin. His legs spread themselves until the proper balance stabilized his stance. Every sinew of his body tensed under his command. Then in one soft breath he let loose the fury of his technique. No music, no melodic rhythm with which to coordinate his moves, only the deadly movements of the Shaolin fist. He closed the distance between him and his enemy as he leaped forward and spun around sending a strong kick with his back leg to the chest of the armored warrior.

A loud clang broke out as the inhuman strength of the vampires kick pushed Metal Man back a few steps. Upon landing, Joker twisted his hips while fanning out his arm sliding them over and around one another until they came crashing palm first into the side of the enemies rib cage and sternum. Each time the ivory colored fist of the vampire careened with the metallic armor of his foe a loud clang could be heard. Like a church bell the pounding sound of Joker’s attack rang out as he pressed the offensive. To his credit the unpredictable and insane movements of Metal Mans defense made it increasingly difficult for the vampire lord to land any blows that were not partially blocked or parried. Unrelenting, Joker slid his movements together allowing for his kicks and punches to become fluid like the bending stream of a river. The formless strikes of the Wu-Tang liquid palm technique gave him the range needed to adapt to the armored warriors unpredictable blocks and counters. The vampire lord swayed his head back and forth, side to side as he dodged counter blows from his enemy while firing off strikes of his own. As Joker’s preternatural speed increased, so did his opponents, sending the two warriors into a blurring fury of movements. His enemy quickly began exhausting steam from his crevices like the pipe stack of a locomotive as the two warriors came to rest in a clench. Joker and Metal Man held each others arms, each sending their incredible strength into their hands. The vampire smiled and pulled back on his right leg to gain momentum. Once again his style of attack had changed to adapt to the situation. Removing the center of balance from his opponent, Joker used the kinetic force of his backward movements to push his weight unexpectedly forward. A rippling wave of momentum ran up the vampires legs through his back and right into his arms. Stirring them in large circular motions he pushed forward allowing the momentum from his motions to move his armored foes arms counter clockwise in response.

The Ti-Chi Chuan soft hand technique allowed for the vampire lord to use both his opponent’s momentum as well as his own as a weapon of force. With their arms spread outward circling each other, Joker stopped the motion of his right hand and took hold of his enemy by the wrist. A strong yank on the warrior’s limb sent him immediately towards the vampire; while his left hand knocked away the arm it was rounding and cocked itself back. One single blow from the open palm of Joker’s hand sent a rush of dark chi energy into the center chest of his enemy. The sheer force of the hit panged against the armor of the warrior and sent him vibrating backwards like a struck cymbal.

Joker moved his arms across each other and finally rested his stance. His eyes fixated on his enemy and his energy slowly subsiding from the palms of his hands he waited for his enemy to get up and fight.

The Man of steel again stood up, this time nodding slightly.

"Now that... that is what I call a fight." -cough- -cough- -hack-

He took his bruised midsection plate and snapped it back into place--it had been dented quite horribly by that attack. His armor looked a little crinkly from all the antics involved. It was also completely overheated. He slammed the speaker shut, although it had long ago run out of shock value anyway.

The man surveyed his surroundings and slowly moved his right hand, his foe most likely watching for any sudden moves--even the most innocent gesture could turn violent when Metal Man was in the house.

The man of steel snickered and then idly rubbed his finger in a diagonal arc across some nearby trees. But... nothing happened. He then slowly walked around his foe, like a wolf studying his prey. His lantern-jaw agape in contemplation, he scanned Joker and compiled a small wealth of information on his status. This would be useful... later.

Right now he was simply breathing heavily and cooling off. Perhaps that in itself was an attack? He bent a rock in two and chucked it over his shoulder.

"The second attack... is coming." He said this as if somebody else was gonna do it, and if it was the apocalypse. Which was bizarre, as he himself had no such power. Joker could probably tell that he had not much energy now, with most of it being waste heat that was burning things he touched and slowly escaping.

The Metal Man walked 'round once more, clanking softly until he faced Joker sideways. He then put his palms together and bowed silently, before assuming the stance of a... statue?

Naturally there was no real effect to this, but it was certainly an indicator. Metal Man was freakin' weird, that is.

OOC: You sure arent taking your time replying are you
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The vampire lord stood back for a moment as he assessed the situation. He knew by instinct that no warrior no matter how foolish makes a move with out having some sort of purpose behind it. With this in mind, Joker pondered to what end this arrogant bastard might be planning.

- well - * He thought to himself

- I suppose I could make my own preparations for what ever he is planning in that psychotic mad house he calls a mind -

The vampire took to the burning skies and stopped suddenly when he had reached the apex of his ascent. Extending his hands away from him; he commanded the winds to blow out the flames still burring through out the atmosphere. Dark rain clouds of dense shadow began to gather around the evil nosferatu as he called out the sacred words of magic in a gothic chant of sorts. Lighting began to crack from the blackened clouds giving a dim flash of light to their otherwise infinite darkness. Joker beckoned forth the rain and commanded the element to fall with great ferocity. Again to the winds he called sending them into a powerful gust across the battlefield.

A typhoon bore down upon the entire forest which by now was more or less a destroyed field of butchered trees. Joker clasped his hands together and steadily began releasing his magical energies from his soul. Mentally he chanted the words from the tomb of eternal darkness and summoned forth the enforcer of the great god Xel'lotath. From the depths of the blakened skies erupted a roar that parted the clouds around it. The ground below rumbled from the volume of this creatures howl. Through the shadows of the clouds emerged a glowing dragon of a darkened jade color. It was a dragon with out wings, moving its way through the air as am eel swims through an ocean. Much like the dragons of ancient China, this creation was monstrously long and sported green spikes along its back. Atop its head stood Joker the Vampire Lord, arms folded and eyes blazing an deep emerald.

The dragon of Xel'lotath hovered above the inanimate statue and drooled its acid based saliva over its head. Rain was falling at an ever increasing rate, lighting and thunder struck continuously through out the heavens and the winds bellowed with all of mothers natures force. Joker had prepared as much as he could....now he would wait for his enemy to make his move.

OOC: I prefer a rapid style, which keeps me on my toes. And, most importantly, it encourages complete battles--which, until recently, I only had one, and it was a really poorly done one which took a year to make, against Demonoid.

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Metal Man noted the saliva. It damaged his armor, but he didn't care. He stood slightly more, then suddenly his visor lit up. Odd. People's eyes... they don't glow like that, do they? It was almost orange--and his visor was normally blue, too!

It rained fiercely. The forest had been wrecked, and Joker had broken out the real weapons, in anticipation of what, obviously, had to be something nasty. After all, the Metal Man had never lied when he predicted things--but he was prone to bending what he said so as to be worse than that. His speech was always crooked... never bent, but never easy to decipher either.

Speaking of that, he spoke once again.

"Ahhh... you have played right into my hands. Forseeing an incredible attack, you have pulled out the stops. But you have put yourself between the stops and me... your own attacks betray you!"

The Joker might spend a moment contemplating, before he'd realize it was really dangerous for a man made of steel to be between the sky and him.

And why would he realize this?

KRAKOOOOM!!!

When the first bolt of lightning, something even he and his summoned being couldn't entirely control, flew from the sky and through the path of least resistance towards the ground--in this case, Joker and his mount. The strike being hotter than the surface of the sun, and with all that water... it would likely kentucky-fry the Joker and his beast if he wasn't well insulated.

It would then proceed to hit Metal Man; but his suit was made with knowledge of this. It flowed over the outside of Metal Man's suit and harmlessly to the ground.

Metal Man continued to stand. The lightning got worse. Metal Man began laughing like a crazed loon as the lightning strikes increased in frequency. One... two... five... TEN! The lightning was attracted like crazy to him, and Joker remained an easy way to get to him. The lightning struck Joker over and over--and would not stop, unless either the storm ended or the vampire being picked up his chips and moved away from Metal Man.

Metal Man remained in his statuesque state, having made no real attack except to turn off his lightning dampener--a simple device which, normally, would make lightning not so likely to hit him. With it off, he became dangerous to even stand next to, the ground around him burnt black--and likely also the Joker, unless he had a can of anti-lightning spray on his person.

The deafening roar of the lightning strikes complemented the smell of rain hitting scorched flesh and dirt--the Metal Man's glowing visor continued to shine. The Man commented giddily to himself.

"All I did was turn on a light in my visor. Bwa ha ha ha ha haaaaaaa!"

All was not right... in Jokerville.

OOC: Sorry I've been watching way too much Naruto with my kid.
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Over and over the vampire lord was pounded by Zeus’s bolts of lightning. His insides cooked from the sheer heat of each blast as his mind struggled to stay sharp through the pain. The dragon of Xel’lotah seemed to be unaffected by the striking bolts of lighting as they crashed into the vampire atop its head. Instead it waivered in the air like a faithful hound waiting to carry out its masters will. Joker would not move from his position over the immobile metal warrior. Instead he clasped his hands together and rapidly motioned various hand sings in-between each bolt of lighting that struck him. The first sign he completed released his magical energies into the ground directly beneath the statuesque warrior. With the rain beating down upon the scorched earth it quickly absorbed into the black dirt turning it into a soft muddy substance. The vampire’s second hand sign pulled more lighting from the sky and fixed them on his position. However instead of continuing to cause him damage like the first barrage of lighting, the energy released from the heavens was now replacing his own. Instead of using up all his own strength and power he would now use the power from the heavens.

The intense light from each bolt crackled around the vampire lord as his body began to channel the great power through is undead corpse and into his hands. Below him, the armored warrior had already begun to sink into the earth as it’s once firm and solid texture became a variable quicksand of mush. When the inanimate warrior had sunk beneath the cover of earth, Joker burning bright with electric energy began converting the lightings power into a dark force for his dragon to use. Underneath nearly a mile of soil, the metallic warrior began to feel the intense pressure of the ground around him squeeze together as if it were trying to formulate cols into diamonds. The intense pressure was magnified by Joker’s will as he used the nearly endless power of the heavens to solidify the earth far beyond its normal density. From both sides of him as well as beneath and above him the earth sought to crush the armored warrior and imprison him with in its womb.

Joker lifted himself from off the dragon all the while still being struck by the rays of light shooting from the clouds. His finger pointed to the mound of black dirt where the metal warrior once stood and gave the command to his creature. With out hesitation the large jade serpent bent forward and dove with great speed into the ground. The vampire lord gathered to him every last electron from the dark clouds and processed into him their great power. His creature broke through the now solid earth as it drilled its way to the compressed warrior. Burning with the power that Joker had infused into it, the creature began to self destruct as it made its way through the miles of earth that Metal Man had been pulled under. Reaching its intended target the dragon opened its mouth and swallowed the warrior whole while continuing to borough through the underbelly of this planet. In seconds it had reached the central core of this planets epicenter and obeying its masters commands shot itself right into its boiling magma. As expected the chain reaction from the exploding dragon and molten core of the planet was magnificent. The sheer force of the blast broke open huge fissures around the entire planet as steam and smoke released from its depths. A massive volcano exploded from the ground where Joker’s dragon had made its entrance into the earth. From the mouth of the volcano ruptured green boiling lava that spewed upwards in a fountain of fire. Joker hovered only inches above the geyser as it spouted from out the mouth of the volcano.

With his keen vampire eyes, Joker quickly spotted his enemy. The metallic armor of the warrior was glowing from the intense fountain of lava that carried him from out the belly of the earth and high into the sky. Joker looked down and snatched the warrior as he reached the end of the geyser. With Metal Mans armor still burning hot from the green lava and slightly weakened from the incredible pressure that had squeezed around it, Joker took the warrior by the arm and bent it backward. His inhuman strength had been given an insane boost of power from all the lighting that had struck him. And now all that strength and power was being used to bend back the metallic warriors arm like the neck of a spoon. The vampire lord grabbed the other arm while its material could still be molded and pulled it behind Metal Mans back. Joker then tied the two arms together the way a child ties a knot on their shoe lace. Binding his enemy in their own limbs was just the beginning. The vampire lord took the warrior by the knotted arms and began swinging him around like a cat by its tail. His speed combined with the blowing wind and falling rain accelerated the cooling process of the armored warrior’s metal.

(Think of how the FF4 beat Dr. Doom in the first movie)

With his enemy now a living statue, Joker sent what little energy he had left from the lighting attack into a boulder that had blown off the top of the erupting volcano. The beam of electricity hit the boulder instantly magnetizing it. The vampire lord lifted the large magnet with is mind and sent it sky rocketing upward towards the atmosphere. As it flew passed the floating warriors its massive magnetic field forced the armored warrior from Joker’s grip and pulled him along its path into outer space. The vampire watched as the two objects became smaller and smaller until fading away into the blackness of space.

Joker waved his hands across the sky ceasing the rain from falling and sending the dark rain clouds to dissolve into the atmosphere once more.

Though the attacks had been great, Joker had left off one thing from his mind.

The entire time they were happening, Metal Man did not waste his time feeling pain (although he did take much damage), but rather plotting.

As he was floating into outer space, he had managed to concoct a very elaborate and evil plan. Indeed, sending him into outer space allowed him liberties that no sane person would have knowingly bestowed on the known serial killer of a bounty hunter.

His arms tied together, his armor hardened with the joints stuck together, electricity and magnetism raking all his joints, it would seem as if he had been defeated; indeed, no normal person could withstand such punishment.

Of course, that was the thing. His hands, the things keeping the knot together, were entirely made of metal. His arms, not so much, but he would be able to make them usable soon.

The man saw the planet and the sun, and the nearby solar system from his vantage point. His hands silently popped free and he untied his arm stubs, grimacing a little from the pain as he used his armor as a splint. His joints cracked free, losing some mobility in the process.

Mathematical equations began to flood his visor as he calculated the momentum and gravity of the area. One thing he had been doing, unbenownst to his foe, was storing up energy; his systems had concealed capacitors which he made sure to keep hidden. This energy was currently at full power, due to the constant lightning and other energies which had been hitting his armor.

He clicked his hands back onto his arms, shuddering a little as he broke all his joints free, bits of melted metal floating into space. He finished his calculations, seeing nearby planetoids that would do. He realized his own ability to push things was minor--but there was a whole string of planetoids to play with all the way out here, and a large magnetized object with him at that.

He precisely adjusted the velocity of the magnetized bolder using his boot jets as thrust, setting into motion a kind of gigantic domino puzzle. There, in the immense black beauty of space, the tiny Metal Man and the boulder wove through countless floating objects, sling-shotting across their gravitational pulls until they hit quite high velocities. Fast enough to destroy normal men, but Metal Man's armor still had immense inertial dampening.

Metal Man pulled back when he hit his limit, pushing the last of the energy he had into the boulder's magnetic field. The field was now quite insane, and it was slingshotting into a field of magnetic-sensitive asteroids quite fast.

The man floated into perspective of the planet, watching... watching.

The boulder hurtled through the asteroid field, picking up more and more rocks, which in turn slingshotted around some more planets. It was one specific target Metal Man had--a massive, metallic hunk of rock... one large enough to destroy the planet Joker was on!!!

...

The gigantic rock began to slowly move as the massive magnetic rock field flew around it and towards the already heavily damaged planet the vampire Lord had been on.

It was going to be a true Armageddon this time;

The Joker would be able to see the small rocks re-entering the atmosphere by now. It would seem trivial--even like his first attacks.

But then something different occurred--there was a mighty CRASH, and the entire planet shuddered. The gigantic rock had flown at the back of the planet, crushing entire continents with its immense size. It had also been magnetized, causing it to rip all other magnetic-sensitive ores out of the planet.

The Joker might have had half a mind to leave, but it was too late. Rocks flew from the ground and into the air as the gravity of the entire mass was disrupted by the magnetic field. Even worse, the sun was getting bigger--he had pushed the entire planet at the sun with that blow!

Joker was now between a rock and a hard place... and by hard place, I mean the sun.

Metal Man's evil laughter echoed inside his helmet, and, telepathically, across the cosmos.

"You tried to destroy me... but you made your worst mistake yet by granting me access to my friend--the electromagnetic field! If you do survive... come forth and fight me on XCV-11!!! HA HA HA HA HAAAAA!"

The evil words would be the last heard by the world Joker was on, as it and the gigantic rock which hit it would be plunged into the sun and melted into nothing.

It would be somewhat nontrivial for the Joker to escape, but still possible. The Metal Man knew this, having only wanted to show his foe never to give the Metal Man a magnetic boulder and lightning to play with ever again. That said, Metal Man touched down on a barren beach-planet by the ocean.

He waited for his foe impatiently, staring at his wrist--even though the LCD on it had been crushed and melted long ago.

"What is taking him so long?" He coughed some blood. He looked a bit squished now.

OOC:

So I take it the baby gloves have come off.

You really threw a freaken planet at me !!

I actually said "ppffft....what's he gonna do throw me into the sun"

I really should have seen that coming, what with tossing a maniac techno type warrior in to outer space. :smashhead:

Now Joker might not be powerful enough to lodge a planet from its orbit.... but I think I can come up with something simple enough to actually work.

=========================================================================



At this point the vampire lord knew he was in a bad situation. If it would have helped any he would be cursing himself right about now for having tossed that crazy fool into the regions of space. As it stood, he had very few ideas on how to escape his burning fate. A vampire and a sun don’t exactly mix. So he pressed his brain for an answer to this problem.

- blow out the sun-

Impossible he thought.

-break the planet in two-

waste of precious energy and power.

That left only one solution and it was one he really didn’t want to use. Joker lowered himself to what was left of the planets ground. He stood silent as everything around him began to fall apart at the seems. Hesitating for only a moment he curled himself into a ball on the floor and closed his eyes. Joker really didn’t like to activate this spell for fear of pain and becoming a horrible cliche. He finally ate his pride and began the chant. In moments his body malformed itself into some gelatinous substance bubbling and boiling over. As the steam and static of the magic spell disappeared into the air a large solid mass could be seen moving beneath its jell-O like surface. Suddenly a giant blur rushed from the eerie goo, pitch black in appearance and impossible to identify. It wasn’t until it reached the outer limits of the planets solar system that the creature could be fully seen for what it was.

The vampire lord had turned himself into a bat. A rather large bat that was native to his home planet Demos. Roughly the size of a standard titan this species possessed the ability to with stand the harsh environment of outer space, which was perfect for this type of situation. As he charged through the endless recesses of the universe the large creature began to emit an ultra high frequency shriek that acted as a powerful radar. It took a few shrieks but finally Joker honed in on his enemies location. The time it would have taken an intergalactic battle ship hours to travel, only took a third of the time for the vampire bat. Upon arriving on this new planet of choice, Joker quickly released the spell and transformed back into his normal form.

The vampire lord was mad to say the least, but instead of pounding his enemies face into the sediment he decided to wait. Up to this point in the fight it had been him who pressed the offensive and forced the action. And at each turn he found himself falling deeper and deeper into Metal Mans trap. Learning from his mistakes, Joker stood still and waited for his enemy to bring an attack. From this moment on the vampire lord would be the one to lay out traps and reap the benefits.

The Metal Man saw his foe and saluted. Indeed, his crazy grin indicated he knew very well what must be going through the Joker's mind.

"Unlike the other foes, whom I have oblitered, you have been smart enough to realize that my power lies in my defense. Very good."

He took a fighting stance.

"Now I can fight a real opponent. I have hungered for such for almost five years, destroying many who did not realize the true nature of my being. Additionally those whom I haven't fought correctly..."

He took out a burnt capacitor.

"...Were due to a broken anger inhibitor. Instead of inhibiting my anger it allowed it to ruin my fighting style. But enough exposition. The new question is: Can you defend, or will you blend?"

He chuckled to himself as he turned to walk towards Joker, his clunky steps making thick tracks in the beach and churning the seawater he went through. This was round 2, for all intents and purposes, so he had to make a good impression.

He leapt up, with an uppercut. He zoomed over the Joker's head! That was clearly not meant to hit. He landed behind Joker and did an erratic shin-kick--but it, too, would miss by an inch. Then he would suddenly stand, and, back facing Joker... ...slide backwards, standing, with his back flying at Joker as if to collide. This was strange, but upon seeing the manuevering jets on his knees, it would become obvious: He had 360 degree mobility!

If that hit, it'd probably make a mark, but it was the beginning. Metal Man would stop and then put his arms out, now spinning like a top. He would float up some, his spinning filling the air with the smell of burning jet fuel and motor coil. The sound was a rhythmic whirr as he abruptly flew to Joker's right and then strafed diagonally from behind Joker to his right side, tilted so that his arms hit the ground and hurled a mess of rocks, sand, and debris in the air and at Joker's face. It would be like being sandblasted.

Under cover of the sandstorm, Metal Man would float out a bit to sea, and then...

...He did a Cannonball.

The big SPLOOSH would be heard, and suddenly the air would smell especially salty. The Joker's vision would clear just in time for him to see a 30 foot wave about to crash on him... ...and the Metal Man's shiny silhouette inside that wave, fist aimed to hit the Joker the moment the wave crashed!

Blinded by the shrapnel from Metal Mans helicopter chop to the ground, the vampire could not see the monsoon of fury that barreled towards him. Joker gained complete vision just in time to watch the biggest wave he had ever seen come crashing down on him. At the center of the wave hidden beneath the undertow was the glistening metal of his armored foe. The insane bastard flew at him fist first moving as if his body was unhindered by the massive flow of water.

The vampire lord took the brunt of the blow and was sent flying back through the massive ocean of water like a launched torpedo. Jokers body was spit out of the murky depths of his would be watery grave and instinctively stopped itself in mid air. He simply hung there as the beads of water fell from his motionless body and disturbed the now calm ocean surface below. A faint glow began to cover him as the blood from his shattered jaw tainted the liquid element from Metal Mans attack.

Heavy was the fog in his head and gone was the mental barriers he had set up long ago to keep his darker half in check. It was only now after that final attack, that the break of dawn shined upon the alter ego of the great vampire king. The madman of his dreams....his nightmare....his curse awakened and roared to life with in his body.

Slowly his head tilted up. A faint growl escaped the clenched bite of the vampire as his eyes became engulfed in flame. He now knew his enemy...the path of truth could not be hidden from his eyes. And the madman would conquer where his other half had failed. Through the water the vampires eyes, now burning an azure colored flame saw through his enemies armor.

- Two layers-

The metallic fool was clever to have a second layer of armor protecting what few human organs still resided beneath his mechanizations. With a nearly clairvoyant sight, Joker saw the red stripping that covered certain areas of his enemies body.

He looked to the helmet and did something that his lighter ego did not. He studied its architecture. Immediately he realized that the design comprised the peripheral vision of the wearer. And that the model was one similar to a helmet of an enemy he once knew. That warrior was able to easily analyze battle strategies and weaknesses of any opponent.

- So that’s how the bastard formulated such counters -

Well the vampire lord knew now what to do. His own gifted eyes allowed him to read his opponent just as easily. And with the proper data now stored he lifted his body upright and closed his eyes. An amazing invisible force released from his body as he stretched his mind into the water, expanding to its full limit. With great concentration and a powerful release of energy he atomized the water beneath him leaving his enemy to fall dead weight into the beach floor.

Joker shot downward at critical speed and smashed into his opponent like a spear. Laying over his enemy in a full guard mount, the crazed warrior shouted the magic word for truth.

VERITAS !!!

Instantly the helmet vanished revealing a face of pure anger and insanity. Glaring white teeth, a horribly crooked nose and raged thin hair which did little to compliment his psychotic blue eyes. As the sudden shock of what the vampire lord just did kept him from defending, Joker wasted no time in his attack. He reached his right hand back and pulled material from the molecules in the air. A bright flash of light flared for a moment and then.....a toaster....an actual toaster materialized in Jokers hand. In one swift motion he brought the kitchen utensil, cord flailing behind it, down on to the exposed face of a stunned Metal Man. The vampire lords movements were a blur as he bloodied the meaty face of his enemy, maliciously laughing like an insane clown through out the process. Finally before his spell wore off he tossed the toaster to the side and shoved both his index and forefinger (three stooges style) into his enemies eyes.m As he backed away Metal Mans helmet returned once more to protect his bloddied face.

He smiled and bobbed his back like a boozey wile taking the stance of a drunken boxing master.
“ Your move sugar tits “

The skull-like visage of Metal Man was as of yet unbothered by the pain. The eye stab flew out, but it was parried--by the man's teeth sinking into the dark lord's fingers. He then punched the Joker back a little and, helmetless, his gruesome face was bare to the world. Bloodied a bit and exposed, he didn't care. His foe was playing crazy.

And that was his favorite game.

"Ah, sir, war is raw!" He raised a fist. "None is won but through... mozarella cheese!"

He then took out of his compartment... his own toaster. By sheer coincidence, Metal Man himself had once used one as a weapon. Long ago, he had hurled it at somebody in a primitive village; the people there, awed by the technology, had come to worship it as a God after he left. He returned many years later, collecting the now enchanted toaster and explaining to the people the truth--after which he had to run away, for even he could not match the rage of those people at what he said.

Going back to the present, the holy-enchanted toaster he took out was well-suited to the job. Heavy, runically charged, and with a reinforced power cord. The Man twirled it like a mace and set to attacking with it.

His foe was not going to be suckered in this form, so instead of eratically dodging everywhere, Metal Man simply walked up, made a feint, leaped over his foe, then slid between his foe's legs while twirling it. Any number of dangerous swings could miss, but it would be unlikely his foe would dodge them all.

It was here he got into the swing of things, psychotically swinging it at such a rate (over 100 RPM) that it generated a small wind current! He immediately ducked to the left of Joker and then swung at him from all directions with it.

"You may take my head, but I think I'll just take your entire body! Hahahahahahahahaaaaa!!!!"

The swings were almost like a machinegun, denting and even burning whatever they hit. A white light from the runic symbol picked up, now causing even being near the thing to burn anything remotely unholy. After a couple hundred swipes, though, Metal Man grew tired of the toaster.

So what did he do?

He bashed it on the ground, knocking out its contents. Then he quickly fashioned it into a new helmet, using one of the slots for an eye slot. Cleverly installing one of his too many spare visors into it, he put his hands on his hips and looked directly at Joker.

"Can't touch this, mother trucker!"

As if that wasn't insane enough, his speaker popped out and made two truck honking noises.

OOC: Next post I'm going Chuck Norris on your ass @!!

Lost in a sea of madness, the vampire did little to notice the pain inflicted on him by his opponent. In truth the real vampire lord was floating somewhere in side of his own mind. A mental shade swimming in the chaos of his thoughts. The one truly in control of his body was the demon... Memmnoch (mem knock). Joker’s darker half, the one he hid from others due to the irrational nature of its character. It was evident from his hysterical laughter that the giant walking microwave had done little to make an impression on him thus far.

Laughing at his enemies pitiful attack, the demon vampire lord held out his hand and created a.....well....lets just say he made a tool of sorts. A rather long cucumber shaped metal rod, rested all to comfortably in the ebony hands of the vampire. Joker’s eyes lit up with glee as he brought his other hand to his lips and kissed his open palm. With a smile he extended the palm forward and blew the kiss to his enemy. No mechanical or technological creation could identify what form of magic was shooting towards Metal Man. In this instance all of his fancy moving parts and high end stereo equipment did little to prepare him for the sexy party that awaited.

Like a mack truck the magical spell hit Metal Man full force. Writhing in pain, the mystic energies burned its way through what ever human flesh he still possessed, instantly paralyzing him in the processes. The armored warrior watched as all his inspector gadget like weapons went go-go nuts ! As the spell took effect a strange sensation came over Metal Man. In fact it was a sensation he hadn’t felt in years. It was the feeling of flesh and bone. Looking to his body, the metallic warrior was aghast at the transformation. All the metal and wires had become human blood and bone. He was fully human again, not a single ball baring was left of his former self. Butt booty naked, he fumbled to walk but was incapable of doing so. His body had not yet adjusted to the weight difference of his fleshy self and his mind had not commanded his legs to move beneath their own power for decades if not centuries. It was at this point that Metal Man felt the invading stab of a cold hard tube piercing his anus. The warrior wanted to scream in pain but found that a dirty sock was being shoved into his mouth by the vampires free hand. When the tube was inserted balls deep into the sphincter of his enemy, Joker turned on the motor inside.

The sudden vibration of the rod sent shockwaves up his spinal cord. His arms flailed about wildly as he tried to strike out at the vampire lord. However Joker was not having any of that. He quickly grabbed Metal Mans hands, broke them at the wrist, and then bound them with magical threads to his fingers. Having lost complete control over the use of his arms, the once metallic mad man was now left to whatever sadistic devices the psychotic vampire had in store for him. Joker pulled back his right index finger and lowered his pinky. In response to the vampires motions, Metal Mans right hand moved over to the top of his right pectoral muscle. Joker’s left index and pinky moved in similar fashion, causing the same response as before. The Vampire laughed out loud as he moved his hands in circular motions and watched the scene unfold before him. Here stood a naked and bloodied man with both hands rubbing over his nipples and a silver vibrator humming away behind him. As if this was not enough, the vampire lord whispered another spell into the air and summoned a shadow clone. A replica of the vampire king emerged from his backside and turned around to face the nipple rubbing idiot.

“Nice” thought the cloned vampire.

He calmly walked over to the entranced vibrating man and....ahem...watched as he rubbed himself. Then, taking Metal Man by the back of the neck , the clone bent his enemies head backwards. Tears began to stream down Metal Mans face as he tried laughing through the sock in his mouth. He did this not because of the pain but because he knew what was coming next and only a mad man would cry and laugh at such a thing. Joker’s clone made his way around the sobbing warrior and fired off a vicious kick to hi enemies man hood. The sheer force sent air rushing out of Metal Mans lungs as he screamed in pain. The dirty sock that had been lodged in his mouth flew right out like a popped cork. With the mouth hole now free of any constraints, the clone pulled back his arm and smashed his fist into the naked fools stomach. The pure force of the blow dislodged the smaller intestines and sent them flying inward and up through the stomach and out the throat. As the tail end of the organ made its way past the back of Metal Mans tongue, the clone quickly shoved its hand down the open mouth and took hold of it. With a hard tug he ripped out enough slack to tie the organ around his enemies neck.

“STRING HIM UP” yelled the vampire to his clone.

The creature nodded and spit on the floor beside him. From the black gob of mucous sprang forth a rather puny sprout. Of course as the sprout came into contact with the air it quickly began to grow until it was a massive red wood tree. Dragging his enemy behind him the vampire clone made his way up the tree. Once he found a branch that would support the weight of his enemy, he quickly pulled free his dagger and nailed the end of the intestine to the tree. Hopping off, he twirled in the air and landed on both feet. The scene was magnificent !! The two vampires watched the bleeding man, hang there from his own intestines and rub his nipples. Done with the little scenario, Joker released the spell and returned his enemy to normal.

Metal Man fell from the tree as his body returned to its former self ending all the vibrating and rubbing the vampire had caused it. Then the clicking sound started to tick in his head. Much like the sound you hear when a bomb is set to a timer. However this ticking sound was coming from out side his body. In that moment Metal Man snapped out of it.

He looked around him and saw that he was lying in shambles on the floor. And the vampire lord was bent over him, covered in grease and wearing a mechanics uniform while dismantling him piece by piece.

“So, you’ve finally snapped out of the illusion I put you in eh?”

“ How was the trip? Did you have a good time at the Sexy Party??”

The vampire continued to talk, not letting Metal Man respond to his questions.

“You see I figured there was a reason why your second layer covered up some of these organs of yours. And I also figured that you would have some really nasty fail safe system that would keep anyone from ever cracking you open like a soda can. So while you were out I put this in your slot where your visor was.” Joker showed him what appeared to be a blue scarab.

“That whole toaster helmet thing.....not as good as your first helmet. I got this little sucker right in to that human eyeball of yours. It did its work from the inside of your body. Kind of like a hidden virus that gets uploaded through a back door in your system. Of course your body rejected it. But the longer I kept you under my illusion, the easier it was for the virus to mutate itself into a strain that was strong enough to crack you open like a safe.”

Joker looked around him

“Now we got all these pretty parts just lying here on the floor....such a mess....Chuck what do you say?”

Chuck Norris appeared from behind a nearby tree and raised the brim of his cowboy hat.

“Well, I say I round house kick him in the face!”

“Good answer Chuck”

Joker picked up the disjointed head from the heap of parts on the floor and tossed it underhand to the martial arts master.

Chuck Norris spun around and gave a roundhouse kick to end all roundhouse kicks. Metal Man could be heard yelling into the wind as his head flew five miles back into the horizon. Joker walked up to Chuck Norris and slapped him five.

“Great work Chuck., I think I got it from here” And like that the famed Texas Ranger vanished into thin air.

But alas, illusions or no, the Joker had launched his enemy into the air again, sans the heap of parts which had kept his own strength slowed down for his own good.

The Metal Man's mind was hardly tarnished despite the illusory torture. If the Joker took a moment to reflect, he might have noticed a strange mark left by himself on the man in the past. This was nothing new to him.

The silver suit which had protected Joker from Metal Man's highest echelon of attacks was destroyed. The Joker sat by with his victory theme already in mind.

...

Then Mr. T of all things popped out of thin air and socked him in the mouth?!?!?!

"I pity da foo' who needs mind games to win a battle!"

Clearly, Joker was hallucinating. Wait a minute... he wasn't. This one was just slightly different from the real one--the real one wasn't wearing a red badge with a yellow Q on it.

This was... a bad sign.

The Mr. T clone apparently came with his own van, and with it enough large machineguns to make Joker into swiss cheese. Naturally he obliged the vampire with the equivalent of a firery hailstorm of metallic death. But it was all the same to Joker, who would most likely eventually dodge the bullets and punt the phony Mr. T on his way.

Naturally, it was a diversion, for a tattered and enraged Metal Man came rocketing in from the other side of the planet, clutching a shredded tree in his hands.

The red suit underneath blazed as he held out his claw-like fingers at Joker, speaking... calmly?

"Alas, but your loser is in another castle. You disappoint me. Your older self was more brutal... and Super Luigi knew far more in the way of the mind tricks you used than you do. That said... I think I shall kill you now."

The man clutched his hands, the energies from the last attack reacting very oddly with his armor. Red energy came forth from his helmetless head. Yet, unlike any SSJ warrior or super being, he did not shoot any death rays. He did not gain a hideous hairdo. Neither did he yell out any catchphrases.

He took out his pistol and... shot the camera? *BLOINK*

The world went dark. For fifteen minutes, the sound of nonstop smashing, shredding, stabbing, bottle-cap-opening (perhaps in a place most painful), burning, cheese grating, and... perhaps even wine-cork opener stabbing occurred. This followed by the sound of what was seemingly an electrocution.

By the time a replacement camera got up, Metal Man was seemingly wearing his armor, which had been put together.

...

...By Joker's hands, which he had torn off and used while he himself had apparently stabbed, cheese-sliced, and otherwise vandalized the likeness of the vampire lord. Most importantly, he had zapped him a number of times in the skull, frying his memory of Metal Man's red armor. Apparently that was more important to the Metal Man than simply killing his foe... bizarre.

The man had only begun, however, as his dented visor (hilariously held together by gum and duct tape) seemed to bend towards the up to now only somewhat harmed Vampire lord.

"You think you're really good, don'tcha? Well, you made one mistake. My mind's already down the drain." He began chuckling manically. "You haven't begun to experience true pain, however!"

This was all a nice show, and all, but ultimately it hadn't done much damage. Metal Man, on the other hand, was rather worse for wear. So what was the big deal?

Metal Man leaned forward, and a large portion of his front chestplate flew off. It had been intentionally sealed the way it was... a small cylinder dropped on the ground. He picked it up.

WHOOMP

It became a somewhat large bazooka. Still not of much import, especially since it looked rather old. Still, the Metal Man picked it up and aimed.

"You're lucky if you see this... it means you aren't dumb enough to die from mere punches." He chuckled. "But you'll regret having done those last actions once I'm through with ye!"

He aimed, and fired. A blue beam flew out. Joker had no problem dodging it entirely. The vampire lord would probably move as to say "So what?", but that was when the beam defied the laws of gravity and curved around, stabbing the Joker right in the butt.

"How's it feel in real life, huh? Take this, you ancient pedophile!"

The first shot, however, was just a feint, as in truth the Metal Man subscribed to more destructive methods of death. It had served to trip up the Joker, allowing the full power of the device to be activated. A small portal opened up within--to where, nobody knew--and suddenly... a lemon flew out and smacked the Joker in the face.

...

Well, that wasn't too bad.

But then! A brick! *SMACK*

Meh. Worse has happened.

...SNAP! A tuba crashed onto the Joker.

Then... a sock? A car? A telephone booth? A bowling ball?

BOOM BOOM BOOM! They began... exploding!

"You haven't experienced true pain until you've met the... DEATHMACHINEEEEE!!!!!!"

An undescribable cascade of objects suddenly flew out, blasting the Joker in the face, behind, shoes, throat, cheekbone, everywhere. They blew up, they stabbed. Poisoned knives, old shoes, limburger cheese, dry ice, two albums of Cher. They all terribly hit the Vampire Lord, who could not dodge--on account of the fact they seemed to follow him everywhere, and bounce off of Metal Man.

But even as these hit, Metal Man felt a bit bored. The explosions only burned Joker's flesh, and he'd been through a planetary destruction event before.

So he leapt up, into the air, and leaped down... CHOOM! He stuck the Deathmachine... on Joker's head. Half of Joker's body was now completely immersed in a world of chaos, the objects now instantly spawning into his face, giving new meaning to the joke "YOUR FACE". At the same time, the rift burnt his midsection like a mother f***er, and the entire thing was crushing him with his weight. That which stuck out from the cannon, however, offended Metal Man.

"This isn't good enough. Everything must be over the top and insane!"

He slammed the cannon hard, knocking Joker free, his top half looking like it'd been cooked well done, and his lower half still on fire. Metal Man took off his helmet, smashing it to pieces over Joker's fried face, lodging metallic fragments into it.

"You want to play mind games? Then experience this!"

Metal Man ripped a cable from his cybernetic body and jammed it into the Joker's head. The evil thing which he had confused Metal with was nothing compared to this--the total memories of the Metal Man's battles. Indeed, it started off in ernest, with the original Joker using heinous pregnancy-analogue attacks to create great harm.

Only now the Joker was in these memories and living them for his own--and taking physical damage from them, to boot.

It would be a few more moments before the awful memories of being ripped to shreds, put together, ripped to shreds again, violated by something evil, then stabbed in the face by a rock and ripped apart again by radiation finally wound down, the Metal Man panting for breath as he weakly punched Joker sideways over.

He weakly smashed the camera from the other cameraman (whom he killed) on Joker's body before then backing away, clutching his head.

"Ergh... this is why you don't mess with my head... you thought I was crazy? Just mess with it again and we'll see who's decapitated by rocket powered antimatter carosel horses!"

He fell over, exhausted from all the fighting.

OOC: How the hell you respond so quickly is beyond me....

OOC: I do IRC roleplaying. I casually roll out three-paragraph posts there (and they're only that long because I break the length limits and it won't let me do any more at once.) That, and I've worked myself upwards by practicing battling here. Partially why I wanted to be in the tournament--so I could see how it fared against Selene.