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Lord Kenny! I hereby challenge you to a fight!

Ok, I'll be Lord Kenny. Choose where to fight.

I don't know all the battlefields yet. Could you give me a list?

Ok, you get the first post.

A dark shadow appeared over the land. A lone figure walked toward his opponent. This was none other than Raji, the legendary swordsman!
Raji raised his sword and pointed it at his opponent, as if to say, "Let's fight!" The young swordsman waited patiently for his opponent's intro, a look of bloodlust in his eyes.

Lord Kenny stared at his opponent, and said "Alright." He drew his sword and leaped into the air, slashing Raji's left arm.

Raji drew his sword, the tip shining in the sunlight, did a backflip and sliced Lord Kenny, making a deep gash in his chest.

Lord Kenny fell to the ground, clenching his chest. "You won't...defeat me that easily..." He slowly got up and pulled a vegetable from the ground. He chucked it at Raji, and hit him square in the face, causing him to fall over. Lord Kenny walked towards him, sword in hand, ready to deliever the final blow.

A masked sage observed the duel from a comfortable lawn chair on the side of the field. He scribbled a single sentence into his fourth wall breaching notebook and took a sip of his icewater.

Finishing blow in nineteen sentences or less or your money back.

Raji got up and growled, "It's not over yet!" He took out his sword and shouted, "SUPER ULTRA SWORD BEAM!!!" A pure-white beam shot out of his sword and hit Lord Kenny, making him fall down.